


Will We Meet Again Like How Seasons Do?

by baekedaelights, moonstarlight



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Angst, Beagle Line (EXO), M/M, Multi, Musician!Chanyeol, Polyamory
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-22
Updated: 2019-08-22
Packaged: 2020-09-24 01:27:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 26,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20350093
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/baekedaelights/pseuds/baekedaelights, https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonstarlight/pseuds/moonstarlight
Summary: An accident led best friends Baekhyun and Jongdae in a downward spiral but they're climbing up, leaning on each other. Having each other as the last resort in having a relationship, Jongdae didn't expect a musician he often sees in the morning train to be part of their crazy arrangement. This may have not been Baekhyun’s cup of coffee.





	Will We Meet Again Like How Seasons Do?

It’s an easy morning. A little too cold for Jongdae’s liking but he still has to get up for his job at a cafe. He stepped over his roommate, coworker, and best friend (not in that particular order) Baekhyun to go take a shower. He’ll wake him after.

The two got breakfast at the convenient store in the lobby then stood outside the door. Jongdae smiled to the sleepy Baekhyun then hugged him. “Get to work safely. I’ll see you here later.” Baekhyun nodded sleepily.

_ Blue, blue, yellow. _ Baekhyun tried to remember. Jongdae touched his best friend’s silver hair and zipped his jacket.

“You’re getting better at this! Call call?” Jongdae did the phone symbol with his hand, shaking it by his ear. Baekhyun nodded and pushed him gently to the other direction. Jongdae waved and went first. Baekhyun signed for him to have a good day. Jongdae did the same and faced the rising sun. His heart always worried when Baekhyun had to work at the other branch instead of where he was. Trust needed to be restored. Baekhyun had to stand on his own after all the misfortunes. Jongdae looked behind him, seeing Baekhyun still there watching him go. Jongdae smiled to himself and went on his way.

_ Look up for 3 seconds, 5 seconds, 10? It’s bright even if it rains, even when it’s night. You should be bright too, right? _ Baekhyun’s iconic advise played in Jongdae’s mind. He missed his voice so much. If he didn’t fall from a slippery mountain trail about two years ago, his voice would still be heard. Jongdae took the blame to himself because he didn’t get to grab Baekhyun’s hand before he fell. He promised to take care of him until he’s all better. He’ll never forgive himself for what happened to Baekhyun. But the elder always consoled him that it’s okay. He’s rolling with the punches. He could hear and read lips so he still understood things. He just couldn’t respond verbally.

Jongdae went with him to every sign language class. They both learned to help each other. Baekhyun’s slow to pick up many hand gestures all at once so Jongdae became his vocabulary, his vocal. They’ve been more attached to the hip since then. Jongdae would always love Baekhyun. They grew up together and will always be friends for life until the afterlife. Leaving each other would just be painful especially after all the things they went through. They even talked about getting boyfriends at the same time so no one got left behind. Jongdae thought it was ridiculous but Baekhyun’s truly ridiculous. One thing changed that hurt Jongdae the most; Baekhyun’s singing and loud chatter, his laughter, will never be heard again. He would listen to past video recordings of them goofing off or singing in the karaoke but that’s it. No one would ever bring his best friend’s voice back.

He entered the train, careful not to bump anyone as he took a seat. He looked straight ahead, seeing a tall guy dozing off. His head kept bobbing forward while he hugged his guitar case. His black ripped jeans showed a scarred knee. It hit another man. He woke up and apologised. Jongdae was amazed how wide his eyes were. His black fluffy hair made him so soft, contrasting his look. The voice boomed. Oh, that’s deep. The tall guy looked at the stations marker and rubbed his eyes. Jongdae did the same. It’s his stop already. He stood up abruptly, bumping the tall guy this time.

“Oh, sorry.” The tall guy apologised, smiling shyly. Jongdae bowed, apologising too. He let Jongdae walk first. Then his phone rang; it’s Baekhyun.

“Did you make it?” Jongdae beamed.

“Yes.” A robotic male voice spoke. It’s the type to voice app Baekhyun had installed to help him. “Are you off the train?”

“Yes. I’m close to the shop. You’re at the juice shop? What do you want for dinner?” Jongdae smiled. Ah it’s that lopsided smile exclusively for Baekhyun.

“Yes. Sushi. Should I get it or I’ll wait for you?” Baekhyun’s robotic voice asked.

“Wait for me! You’ll eat it all.”

“Ha. Ha. Ha. Okay. See you later.” Jongdae hummed and hung up. He looked up, surprised to see that he’s by the coffee shop already. His feet knew where to go. He entered and started his day.  _ Sushi with Baekhyun tonight, noted. _

—

The next day was the same. Baekhyun and Jongdae went to work early because Jongdae had to open the coffee shop this time. Baekhyun waved then pushed Jongdae to the other side. Jongdae chuckled and went on his way. He sat in the train then looked forward. An elder. He bowed in acknowledgement. Baekhyun called as he walked and alas, he’s at work.

In several instances, he kept seeing the tall guy in different places; at the station, in the city where he worked in, even near his workplace. There were days where they had eye contact in the train. Jongdae looked away first. He’s afraid to blush in front of him. He’s pretty attractive anyway. There were days where they were face to face when seated. One of those instances made Jongdae uncomfortable. The tall guy looked at him since he sat down. His smile was kind but it made Jongdae’s heartbeat speed. The guy stopped staring just before the train halted at their drop station.

There were instances where Jongdae felt like the guy followed him on his way out of the station. He looked behind but no one was there. Sometimes they came up the stairs together like they silently accompanied each other. And Chanyeol, the tall guy, lived for those moments.

He did follow Jongdae out of the station sometimes, only to hide behind a column to not be weird. An elderly couple saw him doing such. It really looked weird. Chanyeol liked it a lot when they silently went up the steps together. He felt that they’re friends; a sad one-sided friendship. When Jongdae would go the opposite direction and it’s time to part, Chanyeol whispered  _ bye _ all the time or whisper for him to have a good day. Jongdae quietly wished Chanyeol good night. He knew the guy had a night shift work. Only a musician with gigs would carry their instruments so early in the morning. Unless he’s a street singer or beggar at night. No, the musician occupation seemed more logical.

There were days where they didn’t see each other. Maybe Chanyeol got on the train a bit too early or Jongdae got on a bit too late. There was a time where Chanyeol was inside the train but Jongdae forgot to go in. Seeing Jongdae was enough but it was too short. There was a day when Jongdae was so sleepy, he kept bobbing his head. Chanyeol came from the other side of the train, slowly walking between carts hoping to find Jongdae there or find a seat. It’s mostly finding Jongdae. Lucky him, a woman stood and left. Chanyeol got to the seat and finally relaxed. He felt a head hit his arm. He looked to his left and nearly screamed. It’s Jongdae. He fixed Jongdae’s head gently and let him sleep on his shoulder until their drop station. They both didn’t get off. Jongdae apologised for sleeping on a stranger’s shoulder and looked at the station marker. He missed his stop. Jongdae got off the next stop. Chanyeol followed. The musician made sure Jongdae to work safely and didn’t sleep on other people this time. Once it was alright, Chanyeol went home to sleep. He had written so many songs since seeing the morning flower. In Chanyeol’s book, Jongdae’s the morning flower.

Chanyeol had to go to Japan for a few days. He went in the train but missed one person. Morning flower. He had the slowest train rides in Japan despite riding bullet trains. He wished it was like that with morning flower but that’s not the case. He wondered if he got to work alright. Chanyeol smiled to himself and slapped his cheek lightly. He really wanted to get home immediately. Little did he know Jongdae felt the absence too. Baekhyun kept him company on his morning trips through messages, listening to old audio files of Baekhyun’s singing.

For almost a month, things stayed like that. Jongdae didn’t get a call this morning. Nor was he pushed to go to the station. Baekhyun was sick in bed. Jongdae made sure to leave some soup and money for medicine. Baekhyun would call when he wake, he thought. Jongdae looked around the station near his workplace for the first time in a while. He always had his head down when talking to Baekhyun. Since there’s no call, he could look around.

It’s pretty quiet during early in the morning. People rushed to work but it’s still chilly post-winter. There’s not many cars on the road yet. He entered the coffee shop and greeted the early patrons. Some knew him already. Jongdae shrugged his coat off and switched into his white button down and black apron. He took a photo and sent it to Baekhyun. He pocketed his phone upon hearing his coworker Jongin call.

Jongdae came out and saw the reason. The line got longer instantly. It’s the morning rush and they’re shorthanded. Jongin was younger and quicker in making orders. Jongdae understood and took his spot at the register. Jongin crafted beverages and heated pastries quickly while Jongdae quickly greeted and took orders. No cranky customers in the morning.  _ Please have a good day. _ Jongdae handed a bulk order, probably a coffee run from an office nearby, and greeted them with a smile.

“Hi, welcome to Coffee 9! What would you like?” Jongdae reset the software for a new order then looked at the customer. He adjusted his gaze higher.

“Oh, hi. I’d like an Americano, I—you.”

“You know me?” Jongdae smiled, amused by the situation.

“Yes. I see you in the morning train. Good to see you again,” the tall guy with the guitar case greeted.

“So, Iced Americano? Large?” Jongdae punched the order in. The tall guy nodded, fishing his card from his pocket. “Name?”

“Park.” The tall guy had a…surname. Okay. He changed his mind and paid with cash instead. Jongdae took the bills and lined the receipt to Jongin’s pending orders. He gave the change then reset the screen again for the next customer.

“Thanks,” Park looked for a name tag and smiled. “Jongdae.”

“Huh?” Jongdae looked up from the screen. Park pointed to his chest. Jongdae chuckled, embarrassed. “Ah, yes. You’re welcome. Have a good day!”

Jongdae finished the line in no time then ran to the other side of the counter to call out remaining orders. He greeted them warmly and kindly, earning tips. His charming face really raked in bucks. “Park!” He called. Many heads turned. It’s a common surname. He looked at the cup again. It’s really Park. He remembered who it was and scanned the crowd. He asked a lady near Park to tap his shoulder. Park looked up from his phone and saw Jongdae waving him to come close. He began laughing.

“I should’ve said Chan. Sorry, got used to giving Park because I lived in Japan for a while.” Park Chan explained.

“Park Chan,” Jongdae passed the drink.

“Yeol.”

“Huh?” Jongdae didn’t have enough coffee for mind games.

“Park Chanyeol. Are you also a Park?” Chanyeol, the tall guy with a guitar case, asked while he took the straw from the wrapper. Jongdae shook his head. “Do you want to be a Park?” Ah, so smooth.

“Kim. Kim Jongdae. Nice to meet you, Park Chanyeol.” Jongdae looked at the next orders, dodging the flirting. Chanyeol realised he’s busy so he said goodbye. At least he tried to flirt.

“See you at the morning train, Kim Jongdae! Who doesn’t want to be a Park,” Chanyeol picked up his guitar case and bit his straw. Jongdae responded by impulse. He looked up but the musician was gone. He looked at the door then shook his head, realising his farewell. The morning train it is.

—

Chanyeol shut his guitar case and looked around. The waiters were wiping tables. The owner of the club handed him his pay for the night. “You always bring the party, Park. Japan really misses you though.” Minseok, the club owner, sat beside him.

“I miss it too but I need to be home. My dog’s gonna lock me out if I don’t come home.” Chanyeol snickered.

“The dog or your partner?” Minseok wondered.

“He’s out of my place before I left for Japan. Toben keeps me company.”

“You mean why you agreed to go to Japan.” Minseok was persistent.

“Why does this matter? I’m happy playing gigs left and right. Thanks to you! I’m happy doing music. Really, Minseok.” This seemed to satisfy the club owner. “I have to catch the train before morning people keep it crowded. Tonight again?”

“Okay, go. Be here before midnight. Singles will look for you.” Minseok reminded. Chanyeol laughed as he slung his guitar case over his shoulder, knowing it’s elderly disco night later.

“I’m a musician and DJ, Minseok. Not one of your caretakers for seniors. See you later,” Chanyeol waved to everyone there and met the cold morning breeze. He sighed then began his slow walk to the station. It’s two streets away so no rush. He kept his head down while he walked, watching his feet avoid the lines on the pavement. He hummed a tune he made up then did a quick voice note of it while waiting for the train. He stayed standing to let the elders sit. It’s their morning exercise, he thought, judging by their sweatpants. He looked at the station marker. Ah yes, the park’s at the next stop. He had three more stations to go.

A familiar face entered the train. He lifted his hand and waved. Jongdae did a double take then slowly made his way to Chanyeol. They found a comfortable stance in front of each other. “You get on here?” Chanyeol tried to make small talk. This guy really pretended not to know.

“Yes. I live near here. You?” Jongdae held the safety bar.

“I live near the place you work. My work’s five stations away.” Chanyeol looked out the window to the pinkish orange sky. He’s pretty tall so no one blocked his view. Jongdae pieced it.

“You work at night?” These two are so good at pretending they didn’t know subtle info about each other.

“I play at bars and clubs at night, yes.” Chanyeol smiled to Jongdae, proud of his profession.

“Oh. So why drink coffee before sleeping?” Jongdae didn’t mean to question his habits but it’s just…weird.

“I write songs when I get home. You know that feeling when you’re not sleepy coming from a rush when you get home, that’s it for me.”

“Uh, no. I don’t. I have a roommate so,” Jongdae tried not to make a dumb expression.

“Oh. I live alone. With my dog, Toben.” Chanyeol’s dimple made an appearance. Jongdae didn’t mean to stare too long but it was really cute. Chanyeol chuckled, hiding his face with his hand. Jongdae looked away, feeling shy as well. He heard their stop. He quickly tried to get off but Chanyeol followed him. Right on schedule, Baekhyun called.

“Oh, did you make it?” Jongdae answered. The robot voice became familiar to Chanyeol. He felt like it was deja vu. “I’m almost there. What’s for dinner?”

“Beef.” The voice said stiffly. Chanyeol looked at Jongdae while they walked.

“Wow! You must’ve gotten paid! Will you come back to our shop?” Jongdae pouted.

“Yes. Next week.”

“Really? Yes! Jongin misses you. I miss you.” Jongdae chuckled. Chanyeol was curious if it’s a special someone. Jongdae hung up and noticed he’s not alone going up the steps. “It’s my roommate. He was borrowed from the coffee shop to work for the juice shop near our place. He’ll be back next week. Hey, maybe you’ll meet him too.”

“Oh, that’s nice. What’s his name?” Chanyeol kept his interest.

“Baekhyun. He’s my best friend.” Jongdae noticed they’re at the shop already. “So, see you around?”

“Why are you making me leave? I need coffee to produce music.” Chanyeol pretended to be offended. Jongdae blinked then nodded. He excused himself to get ready for work while Chanyeol stood in line. He couldn’t help but follow Jongdae’s movements. When they were face to face by the counter, Chanyeol couldn’t speak.

“The usual?” Jongdae beamed. Chanyeol nodded. He was in the mood for Caramel Macchiato but his tongue got caught. Why? Maybe it’s not the first time his heart skipped a beat in front of Jongdae. It’s not their first time taking a train together anyway. Maybe he liked Jongdae’s smile since he woke up from his nap in the train; since they first saw and bumped each other.

They ended their meeting with a goodbye and a see you later. Jongin looked at his senior once the morning rush was over. It always ended with Chanyeol coincidentally. “Pulled in a regular?”

“He said he goes here often.” Jongdae shrugged.

“I’ve never seen him until recently. I should know. I’m usually first here.” Jongin looked incredulous. “Could he be coming in here to see you?”

“Why would he? We take the same train in the morning.” Jongdae wiped his station.

“Is that by coincidence too?”

Jongdae felt the need to explain to the younger that Chanyeol’s a night owl and he slept in the morning. He had to drink coffee to let lyrics flow before he slept and forget them. Jongin bit his lip and nodded but he’s not convinced. “Wow. You managed to know all that in a train ride?”

“Not just one. We’ve been seeing each other in the train for almost a week or two already.” Jongdae slipped.

“At the same part of the train? Wow, that’s not coincidence anymore.” Jongin teased.

“I get on the same spot every day. Ask Baekhyun!” Jongdae whacked Jongin with a towel.

“Oh, Baekhyun! He’ll be back, right?” Jongin diverted the topic. Jongdae smiled and nodded. They’re both excited by that honestly. It’ll be fun to work again.

When Monday came, Baekhyun’s arms were looped around Jongdae as they got off the train. It’s snowing and Baekhyun forgot his beanie. Jongdae dusted off some snow off his hair, making Baekhyun smile. He leaned in and kissed Jongdae’s cheek in thanks.

Chanyeol was going up the stairs when he saw it happen. He didn’t see Jongdae for a few days and a boy’s suddenly with him? Chanyeol pulled his hood to cover half his face and avoided the two. He skipped his coffee too. He just wanted to sleep this time. Why was he acting like that? Chanyeol went in his apartment, Toben greeting him. He put his guitar case down and hugged his puppy. They fell on the bed and stayed silent. “Tobennie, I saw him today. Think that was a boyfriend. We’ll stay single forever, huh?” Toben jumped off the bed and left Chanyeol to wallow. He couldn’t believe his own partner left him too. Chanyeol didn’t bother changing into pyjamas. He just fell asleep.

It’s been like that for almost a week. Chanyeol had no gigs so he’s stuck at home. He wasn’t that fond of street snow so it’s okay. Toben picked up new tricks because of the house arrest. Chanyeol got really bored and stuck in writing so he got his coat, phones, wallet, and keys to get some air. Maybe the snow wasn’t so bad after all. It’s too cold though. He entered Coffee 9.

There’s not many people due to the weather. It’s almost dinner too so many might be on their way home. Jongin greeted automatically upon hearing the bell but didn’t look at the customer. Chanyeol dusted snow off his coat and shoes then looked at the food behind the glass. He should pick something up for dinner too. He picked about three sandwiches and went to the counter. “Iced Americano, please Jongdae.” He got his card then looked up.

A male with adorable puppy eyes and silver hair was looking at him. It wasn’t Jongdae. “Oh, sorry. I’m used to seeing Jongdae here. It’s not morning, I forgot.” Chanyeol explained while the guy behind the counter punched his order on the screen with a nod. The tall guy looked at the name tag. Baekhyun. “Oh, Baekhyun? Are you his roommate?” The male behind the counter nodded again with a kind smile. “Welcome back. Heard you got deported to a juice shop,” Chanyeol smiled. Baekhyun mimicked it, chuckling silently. Chanyeol might’ve seen the Snow Fairy for real. Baekhyun handed his card back and bowed. The tall guy went to the side, baffled by how pretty Baekhyun was.

“Chanyeol!” Jongin called. The tall guy rushed to get his cup then wondered. He was sure he never said his name to Baekhyun. Did Jongdae talk about him? Chanyeol turned the cup.  _ Don’t be shocked. Your card had your name. Have a good night, Chan! ;) _

Chanyeol looked back to the counter but Baekhyun was gone. There’s a phone number on it. On his way out, he thought of calling the number. Did pretty boy Baekhyun just hand his own number?

Jongdae came in an hour later, whining about the customer who requested his drink to be delivered five blocks away. In that weather. Jongin clapped as the prodigal son came back. Baekhyun stuck his head out from the staff room behind the counter and smiled. “How are you? Anything interesting?” Jongdae neared his roommate.

Baekhyun motioned something tall then big eyes and a phone. He pointed to Jongdae. Jongin understood it all, smirking to Jongdae who had no clue. Baekhyun pointed to his name tag. He did sign language but Jongdae got distracted with his phone ringing. It’s just a number.

“Hello? I’m not interested in your bank’s loan proposals or apartment listings.” Jongdae answered. Baekhyun ran to his side to listen. A deep hello sounded.

“Oh, hello? I’m not...no. Uh, your number was on my coffee cup. W-who is this?”

“What? Who are you?” Jongdae looked at Baekhyun for an answer. The elder motioned for big eyes and big ears. He kept jumping up and down, acting out something tall.

“Um, it’s Chanyeol? Did Jongin write this number or the other one?” Jongdae almost dropped his phone in the sink. “B-Baek..Baekhyun?”

“It’s Jongdae.” The barista gave up. Chanyeol’s voice cracked in shock. Baekhyun fell on the floor, laughing silently. Jongin held his stomach, laughing out loud.

“Jongdae! Hi. Did they pull a prank on you? On u-us?” Chanyeol chuckled nervously.

“Baekhyun did. Sorry. That’s my best friend. You stopped by?” Jongdae sounded a bit too expectant.

“Ah yes. I thought you were behind the counter so I said your name. It was Baekhyun.” They both chuckled. Baekhyun tried to listen but Jongdae pushed his face away. “He’s pretty,”

Jongdae thought there was something next but it ended there. Baekhyun’s pretty. Jongdae felt slightly jealous. “Yes, he is. Many people come by for him.”

“Oh, is that so? Am I the first to come because of you?” Chanyeol flirted. He sat on his sofa, Toben hopping on to cuddle beside him, enjoying his own sandwich. Jongdae’s tongue got caught. Baekhyun pushed Jongdae, gushing so hard from what he heard. Sometimes Jongdae wanted Baekhyun deaf than mute. The phone flew over the counter. Jongin couldn’t breathe. It’s all so funny. Jongdae dove over the counter, getting his phone. Baekhyun kept clapping while he laughed silently. They all looked stupid from the outside.

“Is everything okay?” Chanyeol worried about the noise.  _ Partial noise _ .

“Yes! Yes, sorry. Baekhyun had a clumsy moment.” Jongdae tried to punch his best friend’s arm.

“Oh. I might be disturbing you. Just called to know who this number was. It’s good it’s you. Save mine, okay? See you around, Jongdae. Tell Baekhyun it’s nice meeting him.” Chanyeol’s smile could be heard. Jongdae hummed then waited for the line to end. He looked at Baekhyun with much disgust then raised his middle finger. Baekhyun cracked up again. Jongdae held the back of his neck like a puppy and dragged him to the staff room to talk. Jongin tended to a new customer while the two battled it out inside.

—

Baekhyun laid in bed after a long week. Jongdae cuddled his side, slipping under the covers. The robotic voice echoed their shared bedroom. “Are you okay?” Jongdae shook his head, snuggling his face to his best friend’s shoulder. “Is it cold?” Jongdae nodded. “Wear a shirt.” Baekhyun scoffed. Jongdae smiled loosely and kissed Baekhyun’s neck. “You miss Chanyeol?” Jongdae stopped moving. “Call him, Dae. He could be waiting.”

“Why would I call? I’m not inviting him out. I don’t really like him like that, Baek.” Jongdae laid back, arm over his eyes.

“Just because you’re with me doesn’t mean you can’t get a boyfriend. Jongdae. You can live your life.” Baekhyun assured. “It’s an open relationship.”

Jongdae reached for Baekhyun’s hand and kissed it. “I can’t leave you because of some guy I saw in the train. He thinks you’re pretty. I’m jealous.”

“He did. Of course. Everyone thinks I’m pretty.” Baekhyun smirked. Jongdae wanted to punch it off his face. Baekhyun kissed Jongdae’s lips playfully.

“You are, Baekhyun. You’re my pretty boy.” Jongdae held him close, assuring him. Baekhyun signed something important. Jongdae nodded. “I do too. I always will.” Love you.

—

Baekhyun looked around the train one morning on his way to work. Jongdae had the day off. He hugged his coat closer to him and checked his passes; one for the train, one for the PWD pass. An old woman smiled to him. He greeted her with a smile. Footsteps neared as his station was called. He let the people standing pass first. He looked at them as the train slowed to stop. Familiar pair of round eyes saw him. “Oh, Baekhyun right?” It’s Chanyeol. He nodded. “Where’s Jongdae?” Baekhyun couldn’t respond. He just rushed to get off the train.

Sad for him, Chanyeol followed like a bee to nectar. “Hey, wait up. Did I do something wrong?” Baekhyun shook his head. He kept walking. Chanyeol felt wronged. He caught up to Baekhyun, asking the same question. Baekhyun sighed and pulled his phone out. Explaining always took time.

“Hi Chanyeol. No. You didn’t know anything wrong. I can’t speak. So I can’t talk to you.” Baekhyun waited for the voice to end before walking. He hurried to Coffee 9. Chanyeol didn’t understand. He followed him to the shop. It became clear. Jongin was doing sign language with Baekhyun to speak. Chanyeol was dumbfounded. Baekhyun’s mute. Guess not everyone’s perfect. He was already there so he got his coffee. Jongin took orders that day. Baekhyun wasn’t any help in conversing anyway.

Chanyeol kept stealing glances to Baekhyun’s back. Jongin noticed. “Will that be all? Or you want Baekhyun to go too?” He smirked.

“What? N-no, no. I’m just curious.” Chanyeol handed his card.

“About what exactly?” Jongin finished the transaction.

“Jongdae. Baekhyun.” Chanyeol shrugged.

“They’re dating, not really. Open relationship? But I heard Jongdae likes you.”

“He does?” Chanyeol was flattered. Pleased actually. The feeling’s mutual. “Maybe you guys should come to my gig sometimes. It’s after your shifts. Come by the bar when you can.”

“Me, Jongdae, and Baekhyun?” Jongin confirmed. Chanyeol nodded. “I’ll send the word. Have a good sleep, Chanyeol.” The younger bowed. Once Chanyeol was gone, he tapped Baekhyun’s shoulder. His eyes widened at the invitation. It could be fun.

—

Jongdae wasn’t sure how it happened. Jongdae was about to get off their stop when Baekhyun stopped him. He wondered why Jongin was still there too. He should’ve been off a station ago. After two to three more stations they pulled Jongdae off. Baekhyun showed his phone to a bouncer, granting them instant access. Jongdae was stunned. Jongin disappeared while Baekhyun danced to the music. Jongdae watched his lightweight best friend down another, stopping the fourth shot.

“Hey,” someone spoke behind Jongdae. It’s Chanyeol. “Didn’t think you guys would take my invite. Jongdae, how have you been?” Chanyeol smirked. His hair’s styled up, forehead exposed. Baekhyun’s heart skipped a beat. Jongdae might’ve stopped breathing.

“Good! Good. You invited them?” Jongdae found his brain! He forgot Baekhyun couldn’t speak. Chanyeol nodded.

“I’m always at your workplace so why not show you mine? I’ll be on in a few minutes. Stay for a song or two, please.” Chanyeol held Jongdae’s hand, begging. Some customers watched them. Chanyeol was a pretty handsome face even under the lack of lighting. If Baekhyun could only talk, he could’ve gotten them laid already. There’s so many hearts floating around them, he wanted to gag. He pushed Jongdae “by accident”. Chanyeol hugged Jongdae upon impact. Oh the musician smelled so good. Baekhyun winked to Chanyeol.

“Do you want a drink?” Chanyeol mustered the confidence to ask. Jongdae blinked then looked at Baekhyun who was holding another shot. He raised it to them, dismissed them with a hand. Chanyeol held Jongdae’s hand, pulling him through the crowd of people. That’s odd; they were already at the bar. Where were they going? Jongdae looked at Baekhyun one last time, seeing a tall handsome guy chatting with him already. Oh, they’re doomed; divided and conquered.

Jongdae was led inside a room. It looked like a waiting room. Chanyeol strode over to his own alcohol stash. “Is this okay with you or stronger?”

“This is fine.” Jongdae got a can of beer and hugged it. Chanyeol really looked good in his ripped jeans, tank top, and leather jacket. He knew Jongdae ogled.

“Would you like me to pose for you? You’re staring again.” He smirked. He obviously had a few already because he’s too brave.

“Sorry. You just look good in those clothes.” Jongdae didn’t know where this bravery came from. The can he held was closed.

“I look good without them too.” Chanyeol stood in front of Jongdae, deadly smirk in place. He opened Jongdae’s can and waited for him to take a sip. Jongdae lifted it to his lips, tipping his head back while drinking it. His view of Chanyeol was blocked by the can. Suddenly, it was tipped back further to the point where the liquid spilled down his chin and neck. Chanyeol watched it pour to the other’s skin. Jongdae coughed once he’s had enough. Chanyeol’s lips were suddenly all over him. He watched Chanyeol shove his tongue in his mouth. His big hands cupped Jongdae’s ass, rendering him helpless. Chanyeol’s mouth stuck to Jongdae’s neck, licking the alcohol off his skin.

They moved to the sofa where Jongdae’s on Chanyeol’s lap. They’ve been down each other’s throats, rubbing against each other. A knock on the door made Chanyeol pull back. “Yeah?” He yelled. Three knocks hit the door. 15 minutes before the show. Jongdae managed to make Chanyeol moan upon sucking his neck. “Dae, we have to go. I have to go play.” Chanyeol whispered. Jongdae nodded, drunk in lust.

The two emerged from the private hallway hand in hand. Chanyeol placed a chaste kiss on Jongdae’s temple before going to set up his guitar. He looked for Baekhyun by the bar but he wasn’t there anymore. Jongin was by a table, dancing in his seat. He joined his coworker to enjoy the performance. He wasn’t particularly drunk but did his mind spin. That kiss was so heady, the punch was worse than alcohol. Many girls ran forward to fangirl over Chanyeol. When the tall guy took the stage, everything felt hot as the lights turned red. His guitar playing should be illegal. Jongdae took his coat off upon watching Jongin laugh. Baekhyun got to their table, wobbling all over the place. Jongdae caught him, very worried. His best friend grabbed his face and kissed him. Baekhyun pouted. He signed something that alarmed Jongdae.  _ You taste different. _

A guy called Baekhyun’s name, grabbing his arm. Baekhyun looked like it hurt. Jongdae got in between them but the guy pushed him to the table. The guy and his friends got Baekhyun. Jongin stood back, hands in the air while another guy threatened him. “Let my friend go!” Jongdae got Baekhyun’s wrists and hugged him.

“You’re not letting go? We can have fun with two. Three.” The guy smirked. Baekhyun hugged Jongdae tighter, obviously scared.

From the stage, Chanyeol turned around after his guitar solo, changing the sound from his pedals. He had a good view of Jongdae’s table. When he saw too many people standing, he looked at the bouncer, giving a signal about the mess. He saw Jongdae get pushed and Baekhyun forced away from him. Chanyeol took his guitar off and jumped off stage. His path cleared upon sensing his anger. His fist went flying to three guys while the other scrambled. Bouncers got them and threw them out. Jongin checked on his friends. Jongdae held Baekhyun in his arms, checking if he had bruises. Chanyeol took his jacket off and put it over Baekhyun. He took his handkerchief out and made Jongdae’s face turn to him. He dabbed some blood off his lips.

Baekhyun looked at Chanyeol then Jongdae. There’s really hearts flying around them but Chanyeol’s jacket smelled so good, he wanted to vomit. No, really, he wanted to vomit. Baekhyun turned his face away and discarded his stomach’s contents. It was all liquid. Chanyeol sighed and looked at Minseok from the bar. The owner rushed to help the best friends up and wipe Baekhyun’s mouth. “Sorry I can’t finish tonight. I’ll take them home.” Chanyeol sighed. Minseok said it was okay. Jongin bowed in apology too.

“Can you walk?” Chanyeol asked Jongdae first. Jongdae nodded. Chanyeol bent down and scooped Baekhyun in his arms. A pang of jealousy hit Jongdae. It’s just confusing since he wasn’t sure if it’s for his best friend or his crush.

Chanyeol had a car. All this time. He had a 4x4 Benz waiting at the car. Some rich fuck. Jongin supported Baekhyun in the backseat while Jongdae was beside him in front. Chanyeol drove quickly, not asking where they lived. Jongdae figured they wouldn’t be going home since he didn’t know the streets they passed. Chanyeol parked at the basement of a very nice apartment building.

“Take the 3rd elevator. 6th floor, 6100.” Chanyeol handed Jongin his keycard. Jongdae was about to go down but Chanyeol stopped him. Jongin figured they needed time alone.

Jongdae looked at the hand on him. Chanyeol apologised for the mess. He hoped Baekhyun would be alright. Jongdae nodded in understanding. Chanyeol reached for Jongdae’s lip cut. “We should get that treated. Will you be alright sleeping with me tonight? Jongin and Baekhyun can take the other room.” Chanyeol offered.

Jongin was settled on the sofa with Toben when Jongdae and Chanyeol arrived. Baekhyun’s asleep in the guest room. Chanyeol got Jongdae’s wrist and pulled him to his room. Jongin dozed off already. Jongdae laid comfortably in bed, thinking about his random ideas when Chanyeol leaned over him. He’s newly showered with only a towel around his waist. Jongdae looked down then back to his eyes. Huh. He wasn’t kidding or bragging. He did look good without those clothes. Jongdae couldn’t remember much after another kiss. What he remembered next was waking up naked in Chanyeol’s bed, some aching felt on his back and ass. Oh right, they hammered.

He got dressed in Chanyeol’s black shirts and wore his boxers again. Oh the pain on his ass felt uncomfortable yet good. He peeked out the door, hearing Chanyeol’s singing and some light guitar strums. This apartment was really pretty for one. He peeked in the TV area. Chanyeol’s sitting on the floor in just his sweatpants. His guitar’s on his lap, hiding his dick (thank god), back resting on the sofa seat. Baekhyun’s sitting in front of him, fascinated by how Chanyeol’s fingers moved on the guitar. Chanyeol made a mistake, making Baekhyun giggle. He took the pick between his teeth, apologised and played again. Baekhyun wasn’t looking at the guitar anymore. His eyes were on Chanyeol. Chanyeol singing fascinated Baekhyun. Jongdae knew those eyes. He’s curious and interested. Baekhyun moved to sit beside Chanyeol and rest his head on the musician’s muscular shoulder. Chanyeol smirked to him. Jongdae felt jealous again. Two pretty people must be for each other, right?

Baekhyun turned his head to Jongdae’s direction suddenly. Jongdae took a step back. He just slept with Chanyeol. What would Baekhyun think? Chanyeol stopped playing and saw Jongdae there. He stood up and placed the guitar on the sofa. Jongdae wanted to run but his knees locked. Chanyeol tipped his chin up and kissed him in front of Baekhyun. Jongdae felt shy. Baekhyun bit his lip and winked to his best friend.

“You didn’t tell me Baekhyun used to sing.” Chanyeol smiled. “And you did too?”

“It’s not something I share. Baekhyun, have you eaten? Let’s get something on the way home.” Jongdae wanted to out of Chanyeol’s stare already. As if he could. Baekhyun nodded and stood up. Jongdae checked his face for bruises out of habit. Baekhyun suddenly kissed Jongdae square on the lips and looked at Chanyeol as he signed.  _ You don’t mind? _ Chanyeol blinked in shock and shook his head. Oh my god, why was that so hot in Chanyeol’s eyes? Baekhyun took his phone out.

“He understands sign.” Baekhyun smiled beautifully. “He saw our old singing videos. He likes you, Jongdae. I gave him my blessing.”

“What?” Jongdae covered his mouth like the other spoke a bad word. Baekhyun giggled behind the hand. Jongdae got the phone and looked at Chanyeol cautiously.

_ Did you get hammered well? _ Jongdae pinched Baekhyun’s ear.  _ We can’t go yet! He’ll introduce me to his friend! Double date! _

“What double date?” Jongdae whined. “We just slept together.” Baekhyun covered his mouth in fake shock, scandalised by what came out of his best friend’s mouth. Chanyeol chuckled at the side. They’re an entertaining pair.

“Baekhyun agreed to a blind date with my friend. I want to take you out too so he thought it’s a double date. If you don’t want to go with me, they can go alone, right?” Chanyeol spoke on Baekhyun’s behalf. Baekhyun whined quietly beside Jongdae.

“Okay.” Jongdae gave up. “Where’s Jongin?”

_ Coffee 9. _ Baekhyun smiled. Jongdae really owed the kid one for holding the fort on his own.

—

Chanyeol drove them to a nice pizza place hidden in the city. Jongdae helped Baekhyun down and held his hand. Chanyeol found it odd they held hands but he’s the date. He shrugged and led them inside. “Sehun,” The tall guy greeted. Another tall guy, not as tall as Chanyeol, turned around. Jongdae was stunned. Baekhyun was too. That’s one handsome friend. Sehun signed hello to his friend. Baekhyun held Jongdae tighter. “This is Jongdae, my date. Here’s Baekhyun, the one I told you about.”

Sehun bowed respectfully to the two. Jongdae pushed Baekhyun who pushed Jongdae who pushed Baekhyun until they were close to the tall pair. Chanyeol chuckled. Sehun seemed amused. “Baekhyun, this is Sehun. You two can talk properly.” Chanyeol introduced.

“I’m Sehun.” Chanyeol’s friend talked then signed that it’s nice to meet Baekhyun.

“He can still hear and read lips.” Jongdae reminded them. Sehun nodded. Baekhyun sat beside Sehun while Chanyeol took the seat beside Jongdae. The date began.

Chanyeol was very sweet date. He cut Jongdae’s food before handing the plate to him. Sehun was about to do the same but Baekhyun beat him to it. The youngest thanked him shyly then stole a glance to Jongdae. Chanyeol looked at Sehun then arched a brow. They both looked at Jongdae who was looking at Baekhyun.

“Don’t cut it like that, Baek.” Jongdae reached over and cut the food himself. Baekhyun slapped his hand away and spoke through his hands. Sehun understood.  _ Don’t do everything for me! Focus on your date! _ Jongdae didn’t realise he was. He let go of Baekhyun’s hand and sat back. Sehun signed that he could do it himself and he’ll cut Baekhyun’s food too. Baekhyun giggled and fed a piece to Sehun. Chanyeol asked Jongdae if he’s alright. Jongdae nodded, saying the food was tasty.

Baekhyun’s phone rang. He passed it to Jongdae. Chanyeol and Sehun looked at each other. They’re really an odd pair. “Is this what an open relationship looks like?” Sehun spoke in Chinese. Chanyeol nodded, chewing his asparagus. “It looks like they’re on the date and we are just joining them.” Sehun was amused.

“Honestly Sehun, I’m not sure who I like between them. One’s really keeping me interested and another’s really pretty. They both are but yours looks like a doll.” Chanyeol replied in Japanese. Sehun agreed.

“This won’t work out. I can’t fourth wheel your polyamory.” Sehun chuckled.

“I’m not sleeping with both of them. Complicates the entire open relationship thing,” Chanyeol found it ridiculous.

“Are you suggesting to divide and conquer?” Sehun looked at the two feeding each other. Chanyeol dismissed the thought. He’s simply a new addition. Maybe he could leave the best friends be instead. He could get laid with other people easily. Why would he stay and stick around to a guy in an open relationship?

\--

Jongdae came back from a delivery when he saw no one was at the register. The staff room was closed too. He apologised to the woman in line and took her order. Once she was preoccupied with receipts, Jongdae banged the door of the staff room. Jongin came out, panicked.

“Need a little help here,” Jongdae started three blenders all at once. Jongin raked his fingers in his hair and tried to get oriented again. “Where’s Baekhyun?”

“Huh? Uh, he had a paper cut.” Jongin looked at the open door. Jongdae wondered why he screamed. The customer looked at the two oddly then went to retrieve her drink. Jongdae rushed to the staff room, seeing Baekhyun hunched on the seat, holding his finger.

“Hey,” Jongdae signed  _ are you okay _ and Baekhyun nodded. “Why are you still here? It’s so hot. You’re sweating so much.” Jongdae wiped Baekhyun’s forehead with his sleeve. Baekhyun saw Jongin peeking from the door.

_ Needed a break. _

Jongdae understood and helped Baekhyun up. The elder lost balance for a moment. He held on to Jongdae then gulped. Oh he did not mean to grab his ass. Jongdae blinked twice. “Okay, later when we get home.” He whispered. Baekhyun blushed. He didn’t mean to give his signal that he wanted to get laid that night. Jongin bit his knuckle and tried to make himself useful.

Later that night, Jongdae was all over Baekhyun. He wanted it too. Baekhyun fell on the mattress, clothes getting ripped off his body hurriedly. He held Jongdae’s shoulders.  _ I’m not Chanyeol. Calm down. _ Jongdae blinked twice and nodded. He went gentler this time. The entire night, skin slapping and Jongdae’s moaning echoed the walls. He’s a sucker for Baekhyun, figuratively and literally. Baekhyun could only respond physically by breathe heavily, gripping Jongdae’s hair, scratching his skin, kissing and sucking his face; the more the merrier. Jongdae didn’t mind being the bottom all the time. Baekhyun took care of him well.

It’s partially the guilt from the accident too. Baekhyun hasn’t spoken for more than a year. His family dropped him after learning he couldn’t speak or sing anymore. His voice was his money back then. He and Jongdae would make money from weddings, birthdays, even funerals to sing. Things changed after the accident. No one is completely sure how Baekhyun lost his voice. He just...stopped talking altogether. Even his loud laughter’s gone silent. Jongdae gave himself up one night, just a few days after Baekhyun was discharged from the hospital.

Baekhyun slept beside him since he got out of the hospital. He kept mewling and squirming in bed. Jongdae woke up from the sound. He noticed his best friend jerking himself in his sleep. Jongdae felt awkward but he stuck his hand in and helped. Baekhyun woke up in shock. They’ve kissed before but come on, it was in high school over truth or dare. It really didn’t count.

Jongdae didn’t know what came over him. He kissed Baekhyun for real this time. The elder pinched himself. It really happened. Jongdae kissed him. It’s the first night they shared together. They’ve been like this for a year already. They didn’t mind. The feeling’s mutual anyway.

When Baekhyun woke up the next day, his muscles hurt. Jongdae’s naked beside him, spent and sated. He kissed Jongdae’s hair and made them coffee. When Jongdae woke up, Baekhyun was by the emergency staircase, staring at the sky. Jongdae kissed the top of his head, making the other giggle. “I’m going out in a few, okay?” Baekhyun asked with who. Jongdae cuddled his best friend. It’s chilly even with the sun out. “Chanyeol,”

“It is serious?” Baekhyun typed. Jongdae shrugged. “Sehun was nice.”

“He was. He’s too pretty for you.” Jongdae teased.

“Can I have Jongin come over?” Baekhyun’s robot voice spoke for him. Jongdae nodded. He preferred Baekhyun with company than alone. He knew how lonely his best friend could feel sometimes.

Baekhyun sent off his best friend for his  _ just a hangout _ date. Jongdae cupped his soft cheeks and kissed his forehead. “Call me if you need anything, okay?” Baekhyun nodded.

Jongdae and Chanyeol met at the train station. Jongdae offered his hand but Chanyeol took a step for a hug. The two felt awkward and withdrew. Chanyeol extended his hand while Jongdae moved in for a hug. This was very awkward for a pair who shared a bed together. Chanyeol settled with kissing Jongdae on the cheek.

The two were on the way to an orphanage to volunteer. Chanyeol spent his weekends there when he’s free. Tagging Jongdae along seemed right for him. Though the double date with Sehun raised some suspicion, Chanyeol’s still interested. He slowly accepted that the guy’s not solely his and that’s alright. They’re not exclusive anyway.

Sehun was there when the pair came. Jongdae greeted him kindly. Sehun didn’t ask where Baekhyun was. They settled with the fact that it wouldn’t work out. The date was for fun anyway. The youngest looked at Chanyeol with teasing eyes. Chanyeol scoffed then pulled Jongdae to the kids waiting.

Oh how everyone loved Jongdae. Chanyeol had a kid on his lap, indulging a few with rhythm lessons. A kid ran to Chanyeol and hugged him from behind. “Yeolie, thank you!”

“What for?” The musician smiled.

“Jungdae!” She giggled.

“Jungdae? Who is Jungdae? I know Jongdae.” Chanyeol quipped. The kid whined for being teased. “Do you like Jongdae?” She nodded. “Ah, sorry. There’s a line.”

“Why? Who is first?” She pouted, determined to fight whoever was first. Chanyeol pointed to himself. She hit his head playfully. He was about to reprimand her when they heard singing by the garden. Chanyeol put the kids down, leading them to the garden to find out who it was.

On the grass, the kids circled around Jongdae as he sang. The other kids joined the circle to listen. Chanyeol leaned on the door pane, arms crossed in front of his chest. Jongdae had a very powerful singing voice. It’s resonant. He sang with his eyes closed, hands freely moving to his notes. Chanyeol noticed how his eyebrows moved to certain notes. It’s amusing. It’s a side to Jongdae that he didn’t expect. He found himself falling in love.

Jongdae opened his eyes after, bowing to the kids who clapped. One kid saw Chanyeol standing nearby. “Yeolie! Play for Jongdae!” The kids began to beg. Jongdae felt shy upon hearing the demand. He told them to not force others to do something they wanted. Chanyeol walked inside without a word. Everyone thought he got upset. The kids began to worry. Jongdae thought was such a dick move to the kids. Chanyeol came back with a guitar. The kids rejoiced upon seeing the two together. Chanyeol tried to vibe off what Jongdae wanted. The shy glances to each other was so pure. Children could see the purest things through innocence. Jongdae and Chanyeol felt it; the innocence of it all. How crazy for two men to find love like that.

In the middle of Chanyeol’s playing, Jongdae’s phone rang. He excused himself to answer it. It’s Baekhyun. The robotic voice made it recognisable. Chanyeol saw the worry in Jongdae’s face so he put the guitar down and slowly neared him.

“Baekhyun, just order takeout. You said Jongin will be there. Don’t...just don’t do anything. Put some ointment on your burns for now. I’ll order for you.”

“No. Jongdae. I can call. Sorry for interrupting you.” Baekhyun sent.

“Hey, is something wrong?” Chanyeol placed a hand on Jongdae’s lower back, concerned about the tone of his voice. Jongdae nodded but he didn’t look like it.

“No, no, it’s okay. Just be careful, okay?” Jongdae left the call with a heavy heart.

“Is Baekhyun alright? We can go if you need to get back.” Chanyeol offered. Jongdae sighed and apologised. The two said goodbye to Sehun, who opted to play some more, and went back to the train station. Chanyeol didn’t get off his stop. He went with Jongdae until he was in the bus near his home. Then he went home alone.

Jongdae got messages from Chanyeol; thanking him for a fun day, asking about Baekhyun, wondering if they can do it again. Baekhyun’s already asleep when the messages flooded. Jongdae rolled to his side as he replied to all of it. His phone began vibrating. Chanyeol’s calling. Jongdae tiptoed to the balcony and took the call. Baekhyun opened his eyes slightly and watched a smile form on Jongdae’s lips as he took the call. He didn’t understand the feeling yet but he wanted to hide. So he pulled the blanket over his head and forced his eyes to close.  _ Jongdae is beside me. Jongdae is beside me. Jongdae is asleep beside me, not outside.  _ Baekhyun opened his eyes abruptly.  _ Why...do I feel empty? _ He peeked outside the blanket again. That smile. The crinkles at the corners of his eyes. Baekhyun knew he never made his best friend smile like that since he lost his voice. He resorted to hiding under the blanket, because he felt that he belonged there at that point in time.

\--

Baekhyun wiped the tables of Coffee 9 after closing time. Jongin finished cleaning the measuring cups so he dried his hands. He looked behind him and worried. Baekhyun’s still wiping the same table? Something bothered him, Jongin thought. He looked outside for a raincheck and smiled.

The rag was pulled from Baekhyun’s hand, startling him. Jongin slung it over his shoulder and tilted his head to the door. Baekhyun blinked but nodded. The two exited Coffee 9; Baekhyun looking up and the street while Jongin locked the metal doors. Jongin stood up and offered his elbow. Baekhyun looked at it oddly but took the offer. They strolled near the river. It’s a far walk to the station but Baekhyun didn’t mind. It’s nice to have some fresh air sometimes.

They had dinner near Jongin’s place, drinking a bit too. Baekhyun drunkenly slung his arm on the younger’s shoulder. “Jongin, ah handsome Jongin,”

“What?” Jongin answered, eyes lowered to his shot glass. His knee stopped bobbing upon the realisation. His head turn to Baekhyun quickly, eyes widening. “D-Did you just...did you just speak, Baekhyun?” Jongin’s finger shook as he pointed. Baekhyun pouted, brows furrowed in confusion. He blinked slowly, smiled loosely then passed out. Jongin caught him, heart racing because of what just happened. He shook his head quickly, gauging if he’s really drunk. No, he’s fine. Was it just his imagination? He looked at his elder and sighed in frustration. Jongdae’s going to come after his head for this.

Jongin thought it’s better to let Baekhyun stay at his place for the night. He’d call Jongdae about that later. He ran his hands in his hair upon putting Baekhyun on the mattress. He stayed kneeling beside him as he figured out what to do. His place was good for one. He didn’t even have a bed frame. It’s mattress and floor combo. He fished Baekhyun’s phone in his jeans pocket to call Jongdae. The elder’s hand held his and whined. Baekhyun’s trying to take off his shirt. Jongin whined while he dialled Jongdae’s number. Baekhyun got his hand to stop. He signed something.  _ Please. _ Jongin blinked. Baekhyun mouthed it as well as he opened the button of his pants. Jongin looked at the phone and Baekhyun. He closed his eyes and hoped he wouldn’t regret this.

The younger woke up, feeling the call of nature. He stirred a bit then regretted it. It’s too hot, he thought. Baekhyun’s body was on him. Jongin tried to lift him off but Baekhyun buried his face on his neck. That’s not the only thing Baekhyun still had buried in him. Jongin whispered lovingly to Baekhyun that he needed to get up. Baekhyun nodded and slowly fell to the side. He slipped out of Jongin too. The younger sat up and looked for a phone. It’s 4am. Jongdae had three missed calls already. Jongin knew he was in trouble. He looked at the naked sleeping figure in his bed and got up to put his pants on at least. Walking was uncomfortable but bearable. It’s not the first time this happened anyway. Baekhyun’s break time usually had company. Apologies to the waiting customers outside. Jongin sat by his huge windowsill, waiting for an answer.

“Hello?” Jongdae’s voice was thick with sleep.

“Ah, Jongdae. It’s me.” Jongin began. “Don’t worry about Baekhyun. We had a couple last night and he passed out. He’s with me.”

“Oh, he is? Thank goodness. I was worried he got mugged or something on his way home, or he forgot to lock the door before sleeping.” Jongdae sounded tired too. Jongin caught something odd.

“Why? Are you not home?” Jongin pouted as he thought. Jongdae confirmed he was at Chanyeol’s. The behavior made sense. He looked at Baekhyun’s peaceful aura and frowned. He remembered something from last night. “Something weird happened last night, Jongdae.” This alerted Jongdae. “Baekhyun called my name.”

“What? How could that be?” Jongdae found it ridiculous. A deep voice sounded from Jongdae’s line. Jongin was even more surprised now. Was Jongdae in bed with Chanyeol? Is that why Baekhyun’s so dazed lately? Jongin forced a chuckle.

“Sorry. I might have been too drunk. It’s just my imagination, right?” Jongin tried to keep his tone light but his heart broke for Baekhyun.

“Yes. Will that be all, Jongin? Can you take Baekhyun back later?” Jongdae’s close to ending the call.

“Yes. Sorry for calling suddenly. Thought you needed to know where he was,” Jongin hung up. “Guess not anymore.” He mumbled to himself then crawled back to bed. Baekhyun automatically cuddled beside him. Jongin couldn’t help himself. He kissed his forehead, running his fingers in his hair gently. Maybe this secret of them fooling around could be over soon. Maybe he could finally tell Baekhyun the truth, that he liked him for so long. The feeling’s been more than just pretend or fun. Will he stop being the fool this time? Because honestly, it’s no longer fun for Jongin. He wanted to be loved too. It wasn’t fair Jongdae had two while he had to take a number and wait in line. He’s frustrated with Baekhyun for not seeing him clearly. The guy’s mute but Jongin felt he’s blind too. Jongin closed his eyes and pushed the thoughts aside. A few more hours, he thought. A few more hours like this then they can pretend as if nothing happened. Like they’re on the same page that both of them are just friends.

\--

Baekhyun and Jongdae opened Coffee 9 the week after. Jongin came in coolly a few minutes later, shaking the snow off his clothes and hair. Jongdae’s laughter echoed the empty shop. He and Baekhyun fooled around with the kitchen tools again. Jongin smiled upon seeing them. It’s just like old times. Jongdae neared Baekhyun, kissing him chastely on the lips. Jongin lowered his gaze as he bounced on his toes. Jongdae pulled back slightly, satisfied with it. Baekhyun blinked his eyes as he licked his lips. Behind Baekhyun’s ear, Jongdae noticed Jongin there.

“Oh! Good morning!” Jongdae greeted. Baekhyun turned around and smiled to Jongin. The youngest couldn’t resist. He returned Baekhyun’s smile. “Get dressed. Morning rush’s coming soon.”

Jongin nodded, making his way to the staff room. His touch slid across Baekhyun’s lower back when he passed. This wasn’t unnoticed by the elder. They shared a look which Jongdae didn’t understand. He dismissed it and went to work.

It’s been like this for quite some time. Jongdae’s display of affection towards Baekhyun wasn’t hidden anymore. Baekhyun wasn’t fazed. He’s used to it. He’d return it when he could. Back hugs, actions for attention, even butt slaps were shared all around. Baekhyun would give signals to Jongdae by grabbing his butt, which resulted to the elder to smile teasingly. Jongin got some butt slaps but from the outside, it was a fun gesture. No one knew what it meant except Baekhyun the person receiving. Even the best friends kissing wasn’t new. It just happened more often. What Baekhyun’s not used to was the pair of eyes watching them.

Baekhyun changed into his casual clothes after a shift. Jongdae came in, typing quickly on his phone. “Baekhyun, will you be alright on the way home?” Baekhyun looked at Jongdae curiously after wearing his shirt.  _ Why? _

“Ah, Chanyeol wanted t--” Baekhyun looked away and shook his head. Jongdae didn’t like Baekhyun avoiding his eyes when they’re talking. It’s rude for him. “What was that about?” Baekhyun shook his head and dismissed Jongdae. “If you don’t want me to go, I can cancel.”

_ No! Don’t do things for me like I’m needy. Go, be with him. It’s open, right?  _ Baekhyun’s gestures were too fast and too big. He’s upset. Jongdae felt burdened. “It’s okay. I’ll stay with him.” The two looked at Jongin by the door. Jongdae looked at Baekhyun for an answer, a decision.  _ Go. _

Jongdae took a step back, heart heavy to leave like this. Baekhyun finished wearing his hoodie when his best friend hugged him, promising that he won’t be long. Jongin smiled sadly to them. One guy was going to break them apart and it sucked that one of them would get hurt in the end. A deep kiss on the lips washed some hurt from Baekhyun’s system. He wished safety for his best friend and watched him go.

Jongin and Baekhyun sat by the river that night. Baekhyun laid on Jongin’s lap, taking a nap. Jongin looked around then to the boy with him. He ran his fingertips along Baekhyun’s eyebrow. This seemed to calm the elder. He got Jongin’s hand and leaned to his touch. This pleased the younger. “Come on, I’ll walk you to the station.” He whispered. Baekhyun didn’t move.  _ A few more minutes, please. _

Those minutes turned to hours until morning came. Baekhyun stirred upon hearing the alarm clock. He opened his eyes and stared at the ceiling. Jongin’s up and showered before his own alarm. He sat by Baekhyun’s thigh and offered a glass of water. Baekhyun took it gratefully and looked around. He scratched his arm while drinking. He mouthed his thanks. Jongin smiled fondly. “You don’t have to thank me always for staying with you. It’s okay. I have no one waiting for me anyway.”

Baekhyun blinked. It’s too early to process all these. Jongin moved in for a kiss. Baekhyun welcomed it. “Get dressed. We have to open the shop.” The younger smiled and left for a moment to buy breakfast. Baekhyun fell back to the mattress with a smile on his face. He opened his eyes in shock and touched his chest. That’s odd. It’s beating so fast. He calmed his heart then took a quick shower.

It’s been like that more often since Jongdae kept leaving to meet Chanyeol at night. Baekhyun didn’t press for him to stay or feel bad. He just nodded and dismissed him by hand. Jongin noticed how frequent it became too. He’s barely alone in bed these days. In fact, he and Baekhyun are closer than ever. Jongdae began to feel jealous.

He cancelled on Chanyeol for once and spent dinner with Baekhyun. They ordered their favourites and settled in bed. Jongdae gave Baekhyun a massage, kissing his skin for the heck of it. They ended up wrestling each other. Jongdae grew tired, cuddling his best friend. He missed his warmth for sure. One thing seemed different though. His strawberry and lily scented skin wasn’t the same. The smell was familiar but he couldn’t remember where he smelled it. One person came to mind. “Baek, can I ask something? Why do you smell like Jongin lately?” It’s definitely not the first time he got this scent off Baekhyun.

_ He hugs me a lot. _

“I know. I see it.” The tone was definitely sour.

_ Kim Jongdae, are you jealous? _

“Me? Why would I be?” Denial. Baekhyun could smell it from afar.

_ Exactly. I don’t complain when you smell like alcohol and musk. _

Jongdae smelled himself. Oh god, he did smell like Chanyeol. Jongdae apologised for being protective. Baekhyun realised he wasn’t hungry anymore. Jongdae gave up and ate some for himself. The night became colder since then.

At the lobby, the two didn’t touch each other as they made their way to the train station. It’s best they kept the space between them. They entered the train and stood close to each other. An arm wrapped around Jongdae’s middle. He looked behind and smiled. Right on schedule, it’s Chanyeol. Baekhyun was in front of them so he didn’t notice. He was about to latch on his best friend because he was getting sleepy but the arm touched his back. Baekhyun looked over his shoulder and flinched. It’s Chanyeol. He greeted him quickly then faced front again.

It sent the elder to a day of frustration. He spilled drinks, punched wrong orders, and worst of all, he walked out on a customer after noticing his error. Jongdae apologised and took the orders instead. Who followed Baekhyun out? Jongin. He found the elder at the nearby alley, curled into a ball on the ground. Jongin didn’t care that the ground was wet. He knelt on it and patted Baekhyun’s hair. Baekhyun raised his head, hoping it wasn’t Jongdae. When Jongin came to his vision, he lunged forward to hug him.  _ Take me home, Jongin. _

The young barista returned to Coffee 9 without Baekhyun. Jongdae was about to run and find him but Jongin stopped him. Baekhyun needed time alone to fix his frustrations. Little did Jongdae know that Baekhyun’s on his way to Jongin’s place.

And little did Jongin know that Baekhyun made a quick detour. Chanyeol opened the door, rubbing his eyes. The knock woke him. He stepped aside, letting Baekhyun in. Toben ran to the pretty boy, kissing him. “Thought you weren’t coming over until tomorrow.” Chanyeol yawned, putting his arm around Baekhyun’s shoulder. “Had to make a scene just to be here. I’m staying at Jongin’s tonight. Dae’s probably going to crash here again so be good.” Robot Baekhyun replied.

“You’re really trying to get us together? Thought the blessing was just a front.” Chanyeol hugged Baekhyun, kissing his forehead.

“I meant it. Please love him more, Yeol.” Baekhyun pouted.

“So you can love Jongin? Why won’t you just tell Jongdae you’re sleeping with him?” Chanyeol suggested.

“He’ll leave me for you.” Chanyeol knew that.

“Secret’s safe, fine. Can’t have you two breaking apart because of us. We’re not bad guys. But stay over soon, please?” Chanyeol buried his face on Baekhyun’s neck. The elder nodded. “You smell like Jongin already. I’m jealous.”

Baekhyun rolled his eyes, pushing Chanyeol back gently.  _ Wear a shirt. _ Chanyeol smirked, leaving a kiss on Baekhyun’s cheek before guiding him to the door.  _ See you, Yeol. _ “Take care, baby.” Chanyeol leaned on the door frame, watching Baekhyun reach the elevators.

Before leaving the shop, Jongin stuffed Baekhyun’s essentials in his satchel and dashed out quickly. Jongdae locked the shop, carrying two bags with him. He noticed Baekhyun’s backpack was oddly light. He wondered who was in and out of the staff room that day. It’s Jongin. Jongdae rushed home, ignoring Chanyeol’s calls. When he got to the shared apartment, Baekhyun wasn’t there. He began to panic so he called Jongin. The guy laughed as he answered. “Don’t touch that, Baek! Wait for me, okay? Hello?”

Jongdae hung up. It was smart of him to call the younger. He didn’t save phone numbers in his phone. It’s easy to prank call. But Baekhyun’s there. He’s really with Jongin. The bags from Jongdae’s shoulders fell on the floor. He looked around the room, feeling lost. It’s like it’s not the same place anymore. He didn’t eat that night. He crawled to bed and hugged Baekhyun’s pillow. “Please come home. I’m sorry. I’ll be better.”

On the other side of the city, Baekhyun spent his night lazily kissing Jongin. They didn’t have sex this time but the company he provided was worthwhile. It’s amazing how silence had so much fun. Jongin let Baekhyun cuddle him.

“Baekhyun, are you still awake?” Jongin looked straight, clearly not thinking. Baekhyun raised his thumb. “I like you.”

The elder turned his head to face him, wanting an elaboration. Jongin repeated himself. Baekhyun was in shock. The younger moved in to kiss him passionately, tenderly, desperately, but Baekhyun couldn’t move. He couldn’t respond and Jongin knew why. Baekhyun wouldn’t choose him. Not now, at least in Baekhyun’s mind.

Jongin pulled back, embarrassed by his lack of control, but Baekhyun hugged him. He didn’t want to upset Jongin because he’s undecided now. It took a lot of courage for him to say that and Baekhyun acknowledged it. The elder straddled him to converse better. He got the nearest phone and typed a disclaimer.  _ Please hear me out...in a way I know how. _ Jongin nodded, a little shy this time. Baekhyun lowered his head, pressing his lips on Jongin’s collarbone. The younger was surprised by his method. He spoke directly on his skin. He could understand the consonants properly too. With his lips locking against the skin, his mouth will dry. His teeth and tongue emphasised the letters. Jongin understood this better than lip reading or sign language.

Baekhyun pulled back and wiped Jongin’s skin from his drool. Jongin stopped him and smiled loosely. “I understand you, Baekhyun.” He kissed the elder’s hand. “Thank you for not shutting me down completely. I’ll wait. Until your heart’s ready for me,” Baekhyun hugged the younger tightly and kissed his hair.

\--

Next morning, Jongdae sat on the train like he normally did. Someone stepped in front of him. Jongdae looked up smiling. But it’s not Baekhyun. His best friend really didn’t come home. Jongdae got off his stop, getting bumped by rushing people. Chanyeol stepped out of the train looking left and right. He’s pretty tired from his gigs so he opted to walk slowly. Baekhyun’s prediction of Jongdae staying over didn’t happen, increasing the worry in his mind. He saw a guy fall to the floor after someone bumped him. This woke Chanyeol. He knew that head anywhere. He confirmed it better when he saw the sole of his shoes. It had BBH on the heel. Only Jongdae would wear Baekhyun’s sneakers aside from the owner.

“Jongdae, are you alright?” Chanyeol helped him up. Jongdae took the hand and fixed himself. “Hey, are you alright?”

“Yes. It’s my fault. I wasn’t looking at where I’m going.” Jongdae held his head.

“Baekhyun didn’t come home?” Chanyeol asked cautiously. Jongdae didn’t answer. The tall guy sighed then looked around. Jongdae had that tendency to not take care of himself when Baekhyun’s not with him. Chanyeol realised that when they went out together. Jongdae had to call Baekhyun once or twice before he’s calm. There’s a bakery open at the station. Chanyeol got Jongdae’s wrist and pulled him going there.

“Eat.” Chanyeol placed a red bean bun and juice box in front of the dazed Jongdae. Neither moved. “Please,” Jongdae took the juice and sipped from it. Chanyeol was getting frustrated. He got the bread and stuffed it in Jongdae’s backpack. He knelt in front of the seated Jongdae like an elder talking to a child. “Talk to him, Jongdae. Not like this. He’s your best friend. I guess...spending a lot of time with me caused them to be closer but he’s not replacing you. Baekhyun would never. Okay?” Chanyeol advised. His stomach turned after realising the two were completely doing the opposite of what he’s warned of.

“Y-Yes. He’s old enough to make these choices like you are. Don’t start your day like this.” Chanyeol pouted, cupping the other’s face. He placed a quick kiss on his lips then rose. They walked out of the station together in better spirits. Jongdae finished the juice box too, thanking Chanyeol for the meal.

“What are your plans this weekend?” Jongdae wondered.

“Me? None of your business. Spend time with Baekhyun. I don’t want him to hate me.” Chanyeol scoffed. “But I’m going up a hill outside of the city to see stars.”

“Oh, you’re in to Astrology?” Jongdae was fascinated.

“A new hobby,”

“Can we come? We won’t disturb you. It’s just...a different scene.” Jongdae felt shy inviting himself. Chanyeol wasn’t so sure.

“I’d like if you’d come with me but your friends might be…” Chanyeol wasn’t sure how to word it.

“Baekhyun! Where have you been?” Jongdae ran to his best friend who was just entering the shop. Baekhyun took the blow with a smile. He’s alright.  _ Jongin.  _ At least he’s honest. Partially. He saw Chanyeol a few steps away from them. Baekhyun said hello like they didn’t see each other yesterday. Chanyeol was flattered the pretty boy greeted him. Baekhyun looked at his best friend, asking what were they talking about. “Oh. Chanyeol’s going stargazing outside of the city this weekend. Do you want to come with us?”

Baekhyun didn’t look so keen on the plan. Chanyeol pocketed his hands, pacing behind Jongdae while waiting for an answer. He smirked to Baekhyun. This made the elder’s cheeks heat. He couldn’t deny that the musician’s freakishly handsome. Jongdae’s eyes were so hopeful. Baekhyun’s hands began moving before he could process.  _ So I’ll third wheel? _

“No, no. We won’t bother Chanyeol. We can just hang out in a different setting, you know. What do you say?” Jongdae’s voice became cuter per word. Baekhyun wasn’t going to resist any longer. He nodded then thanked Chanyeol for the invite. The tall musician smiled coolly then opened the door for them. Jongdae went in first. Baekhyun felt a hand on his back as he stepped in. He stopped walking, Chanyeol bumping to his side. The musician arched a brow in question. Baekhyun wondered what was this about. He leaned his body to Chanyeol, making him slide his hand up to his shoulder. Baekhyun was slightly dragged to walk while still being under Chanyeol’s arm.

Jongin saw how Chanyeol and Baekhyun looked like a couple. Having two gorgeous people together was truly unfair. Baekhyun laughed at something Chanyeol said. “I’m serious! You’re really pretty, Baekhyun. You don’t believe me?” Baekhyun shrugged playfully, resetting the screen for Chanyeol’s order. “What can I do to make you believe me?”

_ Selca! _ Baekhyun smiled adorably. Chanyeol turned around, positioning his phone to fit them. He checked the shot as Baekhyun handed a receipt. Chanyeol was confused because he hasn’t ordered yet. He read the receipt as he made his way to Jongin’s pick up station.

“Caramel Macchiato - L, Pesto Chicken Pasta. Total, zero?” Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun who winked at him. Jongin handed him a tray with his meal.

“You called him pretty. It’s on the house.” Jongin smirked, pointing at an empty table in the shop. Chanyeol laughed.

“As expected, Baekhyun knows my taste well. I’ve been craving for Macchiato lately. Thanks Jongin,” Chanyeol carried the tray then placed it on the empty table just near the counter. He watched the trio deal with the morning rush while he eat. They’re pretty cool like that. Chanyeol couldn’t help looking at Baekhyun while they worked. He’s really attractive, even customers fell for him. There’s Jongin and Jongdae near him, charming the customers too. When it was almost over, Jongdae stood behind Baekhyun, hands on the pretty boy’s wide hips. A kiss landed on the porcelain skin of the elder. Baekhyun flinched then looked at his best friend. The next kiss landed on his lips. Chanyeol jaw dropped. He looked away, embarrassed that he witnessed it again. Jongdae scanned the room for some reason until his brows raised. Chanyeol’s there. Baekhyun continued working. Jongin playfully slapped Baekhyun’s butt. Jongdae excused himself when Chanyeol got up from his seat and rushed to leave. Jongdae ran after him but he’s nowhere to be found. He wanted to explain.

Jongdae ran his hands in his hair, looking up and down the street, across the road, even inside the shop again. He turned around upon feeling a presence behind him. Chanyeol’s hands grabbed his face, lips locking with his hurriedly. Jongdae didn’t know what was happening but he instantly melted.

Their lips molded with each other. Each gap, corner, and inch was covered with deep kisses. Jongdae felt the aggression of the kiss, the way his head tipped back slowly. Chanyeol’s grip on his face lowered around his hips. They could feel each other enjoy this. They’re both so drawn into the passion, they forgot where they were. If Chanyeol didn’t pull back slowly, they wouldn’t know where this would lead.

The way Chanyeol detached his lips from Jongdae’s was so sultry, Jongdae tried to catch his breath. His lips even followed Chanyeol’s, who smiled. This motherfucker knew what he’s doing. “Have a good one, Jongdae.” The musician whispered against Jongdae’s lips. Chanyeol released him then placed a chaste kiss on his cheek. Jongdae couldn’t believe it. An innocent kiss on the cheek to cap off their morning? Chanyeol walked past him, satisfied by how dessert went. Jongdae turned around, watching Chanyeol walk. He smiled but he wanted it to stop. He had to work! Jongdae slapped his cheeks to kill his smile then went inside. Baekhyun looked at him oddly. Jongdae patted his butt then kissed his cheek. Baekhyun’s smile disappeared. His cheek was wet. His breath smelled like coffee. Caramel. Baekhyun looked outside.  _ Kiss him once, it’s alright. Kiss him twice, joke’s on him.  _ It’s not that he’s keeping score but yeah, he’s keeping score. At this rate, he’s truly defeated. He kept pushing Jongdae to Chanyeol, that maybe it could be the reason of them separating. He began to rethink his actions.

\--

Jongdae pulled him out of bed one early morning. Baekhyun groaned. “Come on, let’s go on a trip!” Baekhyun kicked him. Jongdae sighed and jumped in bed. “Come on, it’s stargazing by the hills. Chanyeol invited us. I’ve packed our bags.”

_ I’m not going. You go. _

“I want to go with you. Please? I’ll buy all your meals.”

Baekhyun wobbled behind Jongdae as they went to the train station. No. They were only at the lobby. Baekhyun yawned and looked at the empty street.  _ Can I go back to bed? _ Jongdae was too distracted with the few cars passing by. A black 4x4 Benz stopped in front of them. Chanyeol got down and greeted Jongdae with a kiss on the cheek. That woke Baekhyun. Chanyeol hugged him then helped load their things in the car. Jongdae opened the back passenger door but he got in the front passenger door. Baekhyun was slightly hurt. When he looked straight, another person looked at him. Jongin just blinked back to him. Chanyeol waited for Baekhyun to get in and closed the door for him. Jongdae looked behind and said hello to Jongin. When the two in front were preoccupied with the map, Baekhyun type furiously to send Jongin a message.

_ Why are you here? Why are we here?  _ Baekhyun sighed. Jongin felt his phone vibrate. He blinked at the message then shrugged.

_ Chanyeol woke me up. He said we have to be somewhere. Coffee 9 is closed for today. _

Baekhyun frowned. He’d rather be making money than be a wingman. He rubbed his belly. Jongin smiled to himself and typed.  _ Are you hungry? _ Baekhyun nodded. The younger went through his satchel and handed a sausage stick to him. Baekhyun took it gratefully, eating it in one go. He leaned in to kiss his cheek and smiled with his cheeks full. Jongin scolded him lightly. They weren’t alone.

The entire trip, the two just slept on each other. Jongdae and Chanyeol bought food at a gas stop, changed a tire, and asked for directions. The difference of the pairs was beyond Jongdae. He couldn’t blame his friends; they were dragged.

In no time, they arrived at a campsite in the hills. Jongin yawned when he woke up, kissing Baekhyun’s lips out of habit. The elder woke up suddenly. It was a shock. Baekhyun got up and noticed they were alone in the car. He looked outside the pretty scenery in awe. Chanyeol and Jongdae built the tents. They were cooking at a makeshift fire already. Jongin went out first to join them. Baekhyun stayed inside to think. What’s he doing here? A bang hit the window, startling him. It’s Jongdae smiling widely.

“Come out! We got your favourite meat!” He yelled. Baekhyun nodded, trying to push the door open. Jongdae realised his weight stopped it from opening so he stepped back, sending the door flying open, Baekhyun falling out of the car to Jongdae’s body. “Oh god, are you alright? I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry!” Jongdae cooed his best friend.

Chanyeol and Jongin rushed to check on them. Jongdae still cradled Baekhyun in his arms, checking his head for bruises. Chanyeol got Baekhyun and checked him himself. Jongin stepped back unwillingly, weirded out by the musician’s actions. That’s some quick response for someone who’s invested in the best friend. Chanyeol pulled the elder to the river at the bottom of the hill to wash his wounds. Jongdae was surprised. A first aid kit was there. Why did they need to go there? Jongin called him to help cook. Jongdae looked at the two before walking back to the fire. What could that be about?

Chanyeol sat Baekhyun by a rock and got some water for his cuts. Baekhyun looked at the path they went in confusion. What was this about? Chanyeol sat beside him and cleaned his wounds. They stayed silent, careful with each other. Was this supposed to be a bonding activity? Chanyeol smirked charmingly to him. Baekhyun was taken aback. That’s one pretty smile. “This is insane.” Chanyeol mumbled, laughing to himself.

_ What is? _ Baekhyun signed.

“Of course Jongdae would love you. I’m just sitting here and I think I’m falling in love.” Chanyeol slipped. Baekhyun froze. What was that? Chanyeol registered what he just said and tried to take everything back. “Please don’t misunderstand! I like Jongdae! I like you but you know, Jongdae! Ah Park, you and your mouth! What I meant was you’re really pretty and funny, and I’m nothing compared to you.” The heart has been released. “No matter how hard I try, Jongdae would pick you over me. Even I would pick you over,” his voice softened.

Mildly, Baekhyun understood. Chanyeol’s really in love with Jongdae and Baekhyun’s a huge obstacle. Considering they just met, that’s unmatched to years of memories with the other. Chanyeol was ready to accept defeat, or beg for a chance. He had nothing against this open relationship but he just wanted to date one. Not that Baekhyun wasn’t a catch but that would be too complicated. Chanyeol wasn’t a believer of polyamory. It’s already hard to get one’s attention now, what more if had agreed to both. Honestly, Chanyeol’s scared to be in the third wheel when he’s supposed to be driving this relationship. Baekhyun admitted he had to step back but...habits. He admired Chanyeol for pulling him aside to talk about this. Usually, when they’re together, they didn’t talk about these things.

Baekhyun stood up and stretched. It’s a pretty river, he thought. He looked at Chanyeol’s confused face and took out his phone. “Let’s. Swim.” A robotic voice replied.

The two swam in the river, laughing at minor slips and trying to hold their breaths underwater. It’s refreshing. Chanyeol surfaced first, running his hands over his face then hair. He looked for Baekhyun around until alarm crept. He cupped the sides of his eyes to look at the distance just in case. Hands held Chanyeol’s hips from behind. Baekhyun used him to surface. Chanyeol held his hands until he’s standing. He turned around and combed Baekhyun’s hair off his forehead. They both chuckled at the elder’s joke. Chanyeol gave in to one more request and played again. He surfaced first, getting the same outcome.

“Baekhyun, it’s not funny anymore.” Chanyeol’s heart raced. He’s waiting longer this time. Chanyeol went underwater again to search. Baekhyun’s not yet in sight. He kept his hands in the water. “Baekhyun, come on.” He whispered. A hand held his, much to Chanyeol’s relief. Baekhyun surfaced, smiling widely. “Don’t scare me like that anymore, please.” Chanyeol rubbed his bare chest.

_ Why? Worried about me? _

“If I said yes, what would you do?” Chanyeol’s voice sounded thick with longing.

_ Nothing. _ Chanyeol nodded, conflicted for some reason.  _ Your heart’s just like Jongdae’s. _

“Don’t talk about him when it’s between us.” Chanyeol’s arm slipped behind Baekhyun’s naked torso. Baekhyun wasn’t surprised by this. He knew this would happen. His advances when they’re together weren’t unnoticed. The moment Chanyeol slipped, he knew Chanyeol’s heart. And it’s not entirely Jongdae’s yet. Judging by how near the musician’s face was to his, Chanyeol was done for. He’s not entirely sure if he’s happy about it. Baekhyun cleared his throat then turned his face away slightly. Chanyeol blinked twice then realised what he just tried to do. 

They both broke apart and swam to where their clothes were. Baekhyun felt awkward with the silence. He felt quite regretful too. Chanyeol felt the same. It’s not that Baekhyun didn’t like Chanyeol, but Jongdae saw him first. Once he was back in his clothes, he sat on a huge rock to stare at the water. Baekhyun shook his head to dry his hair. Chanyeol looked at the small towel in his hands then stood up. He placed the towel on Baekhyun’s head and dried it himself. Baekhyun signed his thanks.

Then it happened.

They pulled back slowly. No one was sure who started it but it happened. For some reason, it felt...right. Chanyeol was about to apologise but he really wasn’t sorry. He wanted to kiss Baekhyun just for the heck of it. Baekhyun really wasn’t sorry either but he knew it was a mistake. Jongdae liked this guy very much. So much, he left his best friend to go home alone sometimes. Baekhyun lowered his head to taste his lips. Chanyeol pressed his lips to his forehead sweetly.

“This...didn’t mean anything, right?” Chanyeol whispered. Baekhyun nodded. It’s the truth. Or was it the truth that just happened then and there? This didn’t mean anything; not to Chanyeol that was sure he just found Baekhyun attractive, and not to Baekhyun who knew about that closure. They’re all the same, he thought. No one loved him truly. He’s just a phase for everyone. Baekhyun wanted to ignore the dull ache in his chest. He’s used to this but why did it hurt this time? Expectations that maybe Chanyeol would accept them both surfaced in Baekhyun’s mind. 

Chanyeol invited him to go back but he said he wanted a few more moments by himself. The musician understood. He was well-aware of what he just said to Baekhyun and it was clearly the wrong choice of words. To fool his confused mind, he had to cut all hopes with Baekhyun. He went back without looking at Baekhyun. It’s expected. Baekhyun scoffed to himself, wiping hot tears from his eyes. He felt stupid for crying. Why would he cry? It’s just a kiss...a series of kisses, sneaking out at nights to watch Chanyeol play in the bar, kissing him in his car, and very warm hugs. Of course, he shouldn’t cry when he cheated on Jongdae. Was it really cheating when Chanyeol and Jongdae weren’t official? He remembered his first kiss with Jongdae. He cried too, but out of happiness. Why did this hurt his pride? Ah, yes. He’s the phase guy.

He’s been reminded by how people liked him, how relationships were like with him. That girl in 3rd grade, another girl in middle school, those boys in high school; nothing was serious. Nothing felt right. All just wanted him for show, for experience; to say they were with a very handsome guy at least once in their life. But not Jongdae. He didn’t see him as a phase even though their fling was. They’re still together through all that. Baekhyun found that so admirable. He just didn’t expect to feel the same love from Chanyeol too.

Arms wrapped around him with a blanket. Baekhyun lifted his head off his arms and looked at those arms. A cheek pressed to his shoulder. Jongin pouted, feeling bad for the elder for crying. “Don’t cry, Baekhyunnie. It hurts to hear you cry.” He whined adorably. Baekhyun closed his eyes, letting the last of it fall. He looked up to the sky for a moment. It’s almost night? He’s been there for hours? Baekhyun let his body rest to Jongin’s chest. He closed his eyes and sighed.

Jongin wasn’t expecting that reaction. He leaned back slightly to give more comfort. The tears stopped but the hiccups continued. Jongin took this chance. He kissed Baekhyun’s shoulder for comfort and rubbed his arms to keep warm. He looked at the river and empathised with it.

It’s cold and alone, going in the same direction. It’s a heart that can’t seem to rest. It’s too deep or too shallow, too loud or too quiet. Some come and some go. It still stayed going the same way. Jongin looked at Baekhyun again.  _ Why would you stay by the river to find peace? Why would you stay in my arms like this when your heart’s away? _ Jongin’s thoughts bothered him this time. What’s going on with him and Baekhyun exactly?

Baekhyun got up to go this time, putting the blanket around Jongin who didn’t want to go. It’s funny how that spot housed all their worries. Baekhyun kissed the top of Jongin’s head and went on his way. Jongin smiled, watching him go up safely. When Baekhyun turned to look, Jongin only had eyes for him. He didn’t expect that. He held his chest as he walked, feeling odd. Why did it swell this much? Admittedly, Jongin made his heart flutter but not like this. He smiled to himself. Was this the feeling of being truly loved?

Chanyeol and Jongdae were stargazing by the campsite while the food cooked. Jongdae got the binoculars and looked at the sky. Chanyeol fixed the last leg of his telescope and stood behind Jongdae. “See something you like?”

“The smallest star on the right,” Jongdae pointed as if it’s within reach. Chanyeol tried to spot it and nodded.

“You really don’t like being seen, huh?” Chanyeol typed furiously on his phone. Jongdae heard fingernails hitting the screen. He saw Chanyeol fumbling with his phone again. “Aha! There you go, that star is officially yours, Kim Jongdae.” He smiled, showing the certification.

“Whoa, you can do that?” Jongdae couldn’t believe it. Chanyeol nodded proudly.

“I bought it for you.” 

“Why would you buy it for me? It’s not like you can give it to me.” He opened his hand. Chanyeol was taken aback. He talked like Baekhyun. He looked at the sky then held Jongdae’s open hand.

“Even if I get all the stars, they won’t fit your hand.” Chanyeol smirked. “I can only be there to watch them with you.”

Jongdae hated cheesy lines. He hated it so much, he choked Baekhyun once for it. But Jongdae turned away out of shyness. Chanyeol was pleased with himself. He hugged Jongdae from behind and kissed his cheek.

They laid on the mats talking about each other. Jongdae yawned, reality hitting him. “Where’s Baekhyun?”

“Hmm? Maybe in the tent?” Chanyeol looked above him.

“Do you know why we’re like this, Chanyeol? I think you’re confused with us. He’s no competition for you.” Jongdae paused. “No one will replace him in my life.”

Chanyeol felt hurt by that. “I’m not saying there’s no room but I love him, so much, unconditionally. It’s like family.”

“So it’s only until there?” Chanyeol faced him.

“I can’t say where love ends. I have debts to repay him.” Jongdae looked serious.

“Love and debt can’t be good, Jongdae.” Chanyeol leaned on his elbow.

“Yes, but I can’t shake it off my system. All I know is I love Baekhyun too much to lose him again.” The conviction in Jongdae’s voice determined how great this feeling was.

“And me? What about me?” Chanyeol didn’t mean to pick a fight but he’s so confused by all this. It’s honestly so frustrating. He’s been nothing but patient about the entire...thing.

“I...love you too.” 

Jongin looked at Baekhyun sitting beside him behind the bushes. The elder covered his ears, eyes shut; like a child in fear. Jongin hugged him, humming a song to mask their voices. “I told you we should’ve stayed somewhere else.” Baekhyun shook his head. He mouthed  _ truth. _ Baekhyun needed to confront the truth from Jongdae himself. It wasn’t about his best friend falling in love. No, it was about Baekhyun getting in the way of his best friend falling in love because of guilt. Enough was enough.

\--

Chanyeol tried cooking a meal for Jongdae in his home. They were laughing in the kitchen, a bit awkward at times too. Food was forgotten after two bites. Cuddling seemed better. Chanyeol played the guitar for him, letting the tune be his lullaby. Jongdae fell asleep on the couch so Chanyeol took the time to clean and keep their meals in the oven for a while.

Jongdae was about to be carried to the bedroom when his phone rang. A photo with Baekhyun appeared. Chanyeol panicked, his huge finger accidentally clicking answer. He threw the phone to Jongdae’s side and shook him awake. Jongdae stirred, seeing the phone lit. He sat up immediately, concerned why he called. His tone kept getting worse. Chanyeol internally worried as Jongdae got his things in a panicky manner. The call ended but Jongdae’s still uneasy. He looked at Chanyeol apologetically.

“I’m--, it’s Baek,” Jongdae sighed.

“I know. Go, it’s okay.” Chanyeol smiled but the corners of his mouth didn’t reach his eyes. Jongdae didn’t buy it. He took shy steps forward, kissing the other as passionately as he could. It alleviated some burden somehow. “Go, Jongdae. He needs you.” The whisper was so soft, so gentle that he felt bad all over again. Still, Jongdae left. Chanyeol sat in front of his own meal and ate sluggishly.  _ Didn’t he think that maybe I needed you too? I stopped myself and chose you. _

Jongdae rushed to Baekhyun’s side, nursing his insane fever. Jongin stood behind, biting his thumbnail. Baekhyun stirred, feeling uncomfortable with the heat. He felt a hand near his and signed letters. Jongdae looked behind him slowly. “You. He...wants you.”

Jongin knelt beside Baekhyun, assuring that he’s there. Jongdae stepped back, uncomfortable with the events. Baekhyun always needed him. He always looked for Jongdae. When Jongin called using Baekhyun’s phone, he was so scared about Baekhyun’s wellbeing. Jongdae knew the feeling. But something became clear; it wasn’t Baekhyun that needed him, but Jongin. Jongin. Baekhyun signed his name instead of Jongdae. Was he aware Jongdae’s there? Maybe not. Later that night, he watched his best friend sleep. Baekhyun stirred, throwing his arm over Jongdae’s waist. The younger looked at him. Baekhyun smiled upon recognising the scent. He pressed his lips on Jongdae’s skin.  _ You came home. I miss you, Jongdae. I’m at peace now. _

Nothing could break their bond. Jongdae cuddled his best friend, holding on like he’ll disappear. When Baekhyun woke up, the smell of lilies tickled his nose. Jongdae’s in bed with him. He checked the clock as he removed the towel off his forehead. It’s afternoon already. Baekhyun went to the bathroom for a moment. Jongdae woke up, slightly disappointed. He didn’t feel any forehead kiss. Baekhyun returned to their shared bedroom, confused why Jongdae’s pouting. A kiss pressed on Jongdae’s lips, taking him by surprise. Baekhyun smiled to himself as he made his way to the kitchen. It suddenly felt like they were back to their old ways. It just felt weird there were extensions like Chanyeol.

Baekhyun gave his best friend two thumbs up before seeing Jongdae off for his date. He went inside Coffee 9, nervous yet ready. He had to hold the fort down by himself. A disclaimer saying the staff’s deaf was placed on the counter. Many understood, careful with their orders. Baekhyun didn’t miss a single one. Tips were even give this time. His smile won so much hearts indeed. He’ll be fine, right?

Meanwhile, Chanyeol and Jongdae drove to the seaside for a night date. It was pretty awkward at first. The air in the car was so thick, whipped cream was put to shame. Everything seemed to ease when Chanyeol reached for Jongdae’s hand, fingers interlocking on the elder’s lap. Jongdae relaxed. Chanyeol tried to hide his smile as he drove. When they got to the beach, the world was theirs again. Under the starry sky, Chanyeol was just Chanyeol and Jongdae was just Jongdae. Not Baekhyun’s keeper. That’s the Jongdae Chanyeol liked. Nothing’s wrong with being someone’s keeper but they’re their own person too. Chanyeol wanted to make him feel that. He’s sure Baekhyun wanted to make Jongdae feel it too.

Chanyeol did what he could to make the night memorable. They played by the shore, laughing to their heart’s content. Chanyeol grew tired first, flopping down beside their stuff. Jongdae followed him with a huge smile on his face. Chanyeol noticed a phone buzzing between them. He saw the caller’s photo. Baekhyun. Chanyeol saw a police station number too. He passed the phone to Jongdae immediately. Chanyeol tried to listen but Jongdae began running back to the car, worry all over his face.

The two drove back to the city, straight to the police station, where a lady threw hands at Baekhyun. Jongdae screamed for her to calm down, taking the hits for his best friend. Chanyeol held Baekhyun, hugging the dazed boy’s head to his side. Baekhyun was handcuffed and obviously hit. Jongdae and the lady were separated. “What happened? Please explain it to me, my husband’s mute.” Jongdae begged.  _ Husband, since when? _

“Mute? I heard him speak! He’s a pervert!” She almost lunged at Baekhyun again.  _ Stupid. _ Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun, brows furrowed. Baekhyun looked at him then scoffed. This guys really had the nerve to touch him after hurting him. Chanyeol looked around then to Baekhyun again. He couldn’t wrap his head around the voice. Was that...Baekhyun?

“What did you say?” Chanyeol whispered, very stunned. Baekhyun didn’t look up. “Baek, did you...did you speak?” Baekhyun didn’t look up, not fighting, not defending himself. How could he if he couldn’t speak? But that voice was so foreign. No one was near them so who could’ve said it?

“Ma’am, excuse me but are you sure he was the only guy in the cafe? He’s been mute for two years or so already. How could he say that about you? There’s a disclaimer on the counter that he’s mute. You got the wrong person, ma’am.” Jongdae defended him with his life until the lady was silenced with a CCTV video from the cafe. It wasn’t Baekhyun. She didn’t apologise to him, but just left with her ego.

Police uncuffed Baekhyun, apologising on her behalf. Jongdae hugged Baekhyun, apologising for leaving him alone. Jongin rushed to the station, seeing the commotion was over. Baekhyun looked so disappointed with himself. Only Jongin saw through his dazed expression. He knew how frustrated Baekhyun got when he couldn’t defend himself. As much as Baekhyun was thankful for Jongdae rescuing him, he wished Jongdae didn’t have to do that for him. Baekhyun was well aware that he ruined Jongdae’s date. He felt so sorry to Chanyeol. Baekhyun saw Jongin looking regretful for leaving early. He smiled tiredly to the young man before Jongdae smothered him again. Chanyeol stood at the side, concerned but also disappointed the night turned to this.

As Baekhyun and Jongin spoke to the side, Chanyeol pulled Jongdae to the side. He really couldn’t shake what just happened. “I-I heard Baekhyun speak, Jongdae.”

“Oh please, not you too.” Jongdae looked so betrayed. Chanyeol ran his hands in his hair, thinking it’s silly too. His ears must be playing tricks on him.

“I know! I know, right? But when I was with him, I couldn’t shake that moment off. I’m freaking out, Jongdae. Could he be pretending?” Chanyeol held Jongdae’s arms gently, eyes begging for him to be believed. Jongdae looked so dumbfounded.

“You don’t even know what his voice sounded like in real life, Chanyeol. Accusing my best friend for pretending about something that hurt him, us, isn’t funny, Don’t lie like that. I’m sorry the night didn’t go as planned but I hoped you’d understand,”

“I do! God, Jongdae! I do understand that you’ll always love him over me! I knew that the moment you said his name! Do you know how much that hurts me?” Chanyeol didn’t mean to raise his voice like that. He just...he just...why did he even say it when he wasn’t sure? Shit, he passed the blame to Jongdae when it’s his fault for acting that way. He had to hide his feelings for Baekhyun. Chanyeol regretted every moment from there. He sighed knowing Jongdae couldn’t explain that anymore or cover it up. Chanyeol left the police station with a heavy heart and a shallow chest. He felt sick to his stomach for losing his temper. Jongdae roughly wiped his eyes as he faced the wall before returning to Baekhyun’s side.

_ Where’s Chanyeol? _ Baekhyun signed.

“Are you hungry? Let’s eat. Jongin, come with us.” Jongdae smiled. Baekhyun felt confused as he was pushed out of the station with a hand on his back. They walked to the right side of the street, Jongin and Jongdae walking. Baekhyun looked behind him, seeing a hunched figure sitting by the pavement, face covered by his forearms. He easily knew who it was. The question was why did Chanyeol leave without saying goodbye?

The guilt ate Baekhyun even days after it happened. Jongdae was visibly upset since Chanyeol didn’t contact him or show himself to him. Baekhyun felt so at fault. The hunched figure sitting on the pavement haunted him. Baekhyun was vaguely aware he caused this separation. He worked timidly, avoiding conversations as much as possible. Even Jongdae’s touches were avoided. It made his best friend worry, especially if there was trauma from getting falsely arrested. Baekhyun watched Jongdae sleep while he sat by the window later that night. He opened his mouth, hoping to hear his voice. Nothing. He tried to speak louder but nothing came out. Even if he forced himself to scream, he heard nothing. Baekhyun pulled his hair, frustrated that he couldn’t do this one thing that really hurt their relationship already. He didn’t want Jongdae to be locked down with him forever. Yes, he loved him but Chanyeol’s there now. It changed everything for them. Baekhyun knew he wasn’t in the position to keep Jongdae, not like this. In silence, he cried. If he was only more careful that day, they would be alright.

\---

Chanyeol took the morning train on his way home. He stared at people’s feet, completely tired and lonely. His senses woke when he heard the next station. He stood up, weaving through people to get out of that train cart. He needed to stay away from Jongdae’s usual entrance. From the distance, he still saw Jongdae enter. Baekhyun was nowhere in sight. The musician felt relieved yet regretful. He could only look at Jongdae from afar, not have his presence felt, nor hear a bit of his voice.

It wasn’t entirely wrong for Chanyeol to say his feelings about their setup. It wasn’t the right place and right circumstance, Chanyeol knew that. He accepted his wrongs in that part but Jongdae, he didn’t even try to console him. Maybe it was better for Jongdae to keep quiet or else, anything he could’ve said would be taken against him. Chanyeol’s hands felt itchy. He needed to hold Jongdae again. When he looked to Jongdae’s direction, he was gone. Chanyeol rushed out of the train, looking left and right, wanting to apologise for everything he said. Maybe time wasn’t their friend after all.

Instead, it found a new friend; Baekhyun.

The moment he and Jongdae entered the morning train, he wished Chanyeol would be there. The aura around him felt the same, like the musician was close. It could be his imagination or force of habit but why did it feel so strong? When something felt out of place for Baekhyun, it’s like forgetting a ring at home and feeling your finger bare. This morning, it didn’t feel like that. He looked up to Jongdae, but his best friend simply looked ahead, watching the city pass through.

Baekhyun turned his head, looking at the people in the morning train. He leaned forward, looking left and right again. Finally, he did a double take to his left. In the next cart was the person he looked for, confirming his gut feeling. Chanyeol looked at Jongdae with longingness, hand gripping the handle tightly like he had to muster all his willpower to not move. Through the entire ride, Baekhyun watched him, occasionally looking away so Jongdae wouldn’t notice. Baekhyun’s not stupid. He knew Jongdae subtly looked for Chanyeol when they went to work. Old habits were hard to break. Baekhyun kept these observations to himself. When it was time to exit the train, Jongdae went first to buy some tiny bread bites. Baekhyun took his time getting out, making everyone exit first. The silent guy had his hands in his coat pockets, looking left and right. Chanyeol’s wide eyes scanned the entire platform with evident desperation.

It felt like a movie confrontation scene. The platform slowly cleared, leaving the two men to stare at each other from a distance. Chanyeol panicked because he couldn’t move his legs to get going. He couldn’t afford to see Jongdae now. Baekhyun’s eyes softened.  _ Jongdae misses you. I do too. _

This struck a core in Chanyeol. He didn’t expect to receive that gesture from Baekhyun.  _ I do too. Sorry. _ Chanyeol’s really sorry for many things at this point.

“Baekhyun!” Jongdae called. Baekhyun’s head whipped to the sound immediately, startled. “Why are you still by the loading area? Are you okay?”

_ Yes! Sorry, I’m coming.  _ Baekhyun looked to his right again but Chanyeol was gone. The silent guy followed Jongdae to the stairs. Jongdae held his hand like a child needing assistance to go up. Baekhyun looked behind him, seeing Chanyeol peeking warily from behind a thick foundation column.  _ No Chanyeol, I’m sorry. _

That’s the last words Baekhyun signed before Jongdae pulled him away. Chanyeol hit his head on the column, guiltier than ever. Baekhyun apologising added more reason to believe he was the bad guy. This felt so hard to decipher. Chanyeol’s mind hurt so much, hitting it to the column would probably hurt less. Staying away would probably hurt less.

\---

“Don’t play games with me, Baekhyun.” Jongdae wiped their working station, not believing his best friend.

_ I’m not! I saw Chanyeol this morning. He said he misses you too! _

“If he really did, he would come and see me. But he’s not. Leave it alone, Baekhyun. He could just be passing by in my life.”

This frustrated Baekhyun.  _ Why are you so accepting that other people come and go but you don’t let go of me? What if I’m the wrong thing you always keep? Chanyeol could only make a detour! _

“Stop! Byun Baekhyun, just stop! Red! Red light! Do not cross! Do not cross that damn line because you know all too well what you are and where you belong in my life!” Jongdae didn’t realise what he just did. Baekhyun’s back was against the staff door, wrist held tight, face scrunching in pain. He couldn’t make a sound of discomfort. What’s worse was Jongdae’s left hand clearly not knowing what his right hand did; it choked Baekhyun.

Jongin ran to them, trying to break it off. “Jongdae, let go! Jongdae, you’re hurting him! He can’t breathe!” Red disappeared. Jongdae finally saw what he’s been doing figuratively to Baekhyun. He was suffocating the guy he unconditionally loved. Baekhyun fell to the floor, heaving labored breaths while Jongin checked on him. Jongdae scrambled back, terrified of himself. He saw the customers wary of him. Jongdae held his head, confused and panicked already.  _ Chanyeol. He’s going to lose Chanyeol. Baekhyun; he could be right. _

Jongdae ran out of Coffee 9, sick that a new air filled his lungs. He forgot where he was. Would he go left to the train station or right to where Chanyeol lived? Baekhyun gripped Jongin’s shirt and pushed him back. He still hard a hard time normalising his breath but he kept pointing to the door. Jongin was so confused. Baekhyun did a J to his heart and curled his forefinger, mimicking a hook locking. It meant Jongdae.  _ Go after Jongdae. He can’t think straight. _

Clearly, Baekhyun was right. 4PM, he reached Chanyeol’s workplace; the bar Minseok ran. The owner was surprised to see him there at a very odd time of day and in his uniform. He’s surely not applying for a job there. “Minseok, I’m Jongdae, Chanyeol’s--”

“Yeah I know who you are. You broke so many hearts because you got what everyone wanted. What brings the lucky pick here?” Minseok leaned over the bar with a mysterious smile.

“Chanyeol. Is he here? Will he be here?” Jongdae ignored the sentiment. Minseok’s brows furrowed then shook his head.

“Didn’t he tell you? He quit his job here to go back home.” Minseok tilted his head to side. “Temporarily. He’ll be back here to play when he visits, I guess.”

“Home? I don’t get it.” Jongdae didn’t want to come across as stupid but that’s he really was at the moment.

“Japan. He’s going back to Japan. He really didn’t tell you then. So much for being lucky,” Minseok shrugged.

Japan. Chanyeol went home to Japan without telling Jongdae. Was it really over between them?

Jongdae went home after a few drinks. “Baekhyun, I’m home.” He announced as he shrugged his jacket off. No one answered. “Are you asleep?” Stupid question, but okay. Jongdae looked under the shoe rack, checking his best friend’s slippers. He went in their bedroom, disappointed. Of course he wouldn’t be there. Jongdae dragged himself outside to get the mail, worrying about his best friend. As he passed the hallway, a figure stopped him. Baekhyun sat on the windowsill at the end of the hallway, looking up to the moon. He’s in his Jongdae’s shirt and shorts. The collar covered half his face, stitches touching his nose. Jongdae neared him, mustering all the courage to ask for forgiveness. Baekhyun looked so peaceful like that. There was no smile on his face but his eyes looked like they kept the moon’s secret and the stars’ stories. Jongdae may have felt weak on the knees when he saw him like that. He wondered why he didn’t pursue Baekhyun all this time. They would’ve lived a happy life together, hearts content, maybe even have a family too.

Baekhyun looked at the moon, mildly irritated why it wasn’t full. The emotion didn’t show on his face. He kept it in him.  _ Luna, do you see Jongdae? Are you guiding him home? I’m waiting for him. _ His thoughts spoke for him. His hands began to move, speaking to the moon. Jongdae leaned on the wall, eyes welling up with tears. Selfish. He felt he was selfish for putting his heart out for someone else when one back home has been waiting for it.

_ You see it from the sky, Luna. When he says he’s home, it’s when I feel so happy. _

Jongdae roughly wiped his eyes, very sorry for leaving him alone lately. A sob escaped his hand. Baekhyun stopped signing, wary that someone watched him. People might think he’s crazy. His heart dropped to his stomach upon seeing Jongdae leaning on the wall, slowly bending to the floor as he cried. Baekhyun jumped off and rushed to his best friend’s side. He hugged him, cradling his head to his chest. Jongdae wrapped his arms around Baekhyun like a child. Baekhyun let him cry, holding him together like he’d shatter any moment. He looked at the window like he’s asking help from the moon. He too began to cry upon hearing Jongdae’s voice breaking. “He’s gone. He left me.” This kept repeating until Jongdae grew tired. Baekhyun kissed the top of his head, fingers combing his hair. With Jongdae laid on his lap like that, Baekhyun couldn’t help but feel responsible. Chanyeol upped and left without a word after the incident. Now Jongdae’s left to suffer.

When morning came, Baekhyun’s in bed alone. The smell of pancakes woke him. He tiredly made his way outside, seeing Jongdae cooking. His eyes were so swollen. Baekhyun frowned, hugging him from behind. Jongdae smiled, flipping the last pancake before turning inside Baekhyun’s embrace to kiss him good morning. A small bouquet of flowers stayed between them. Jongdae’s shy smile hid behind it. Baekhyun looked at the small bouquet of Chrysanthemum Pompons; yellow, green, orange, dark pink, and purple mixed together. “It’s been a while since I got you these.” Jongdae mumbled adorably. Baekhyun smiled warmly, smelling the flowers.

“You mean the world to me, Baekhyun. I was so happy when you said yes. Felt like I was waiting for it for a long time. The whole you, the way you love me, the way you make me sad, make me happy; the way you take care of me. I know you love me so much. I know you’re trying hard. I know you are still struggling, from whom I expect lot but still you stay with me like no one else did, support me all way. I’m lucky, so so sooooo lucky to loved by you, Byun Baekhyun.” Jongdae poured his heart, realising what was in front of him. On the bright side, it was a love so unconditional, so overflowing, it would never end. On the down side, it’s it; the last resort. It’s not a bad final option but he felt bad making someone so great, so beautiful be the final option when he deserved to be a first choice to someone. How unworthy, how unnecessary of Jongdae to keep him all to himself. Who would be best to take care of his best friend but himself? Baekhyun hugged him, sharing the same feelings. It’s relief but also a sacrifice. He hasn’t been completely honest with Jongdae anyway, sleeping around with whoever. The game had to come to a close. Baekhyun and Jongdae would hold on to each other’s hand until the end of the line. Spring finally came for their hearts.

\---

Jongin watched the two goof off during work. Jongdae’s trying to get out of Baekhyun’s body crushing hug. Baekhyun made faces of mockery, making Jongdae dizzy but lifting him up and down. Jongin’s eyes were focused on Baekhyun’s smile. What a pretty sight. He remembered the times when he made those happen for him. How that smile lit up his days was a big mystery only fools could answer. The younger looked away, pushing his wayward thoughts away. Who was he to feel anything for the elder when he knew all too well he was never his to begin with?

Weeks passed with Jongin going back to his old routine; the one without Baekhyun barging in his room. He found the elder opening Coffee 9 for the 8th consecutive time, no Jongdae in sight. Jongin greeted him, helping him open the doors. It’s been a while since they were together alone. Jongin felt a certain type of joy, THAT certain type of joy. Baekhyun looked at the door, pulling Jongin to the side.  _ I’m going crazy, Jongin. I’m broke! But happy broke. You get it? _ Jongin shook his head. Baekhyun fished out a velvet box from his jacket pocket, holding it up. Jongin’s brows shot up, jaw tight.  _ How does Mr. Kim Baekhyun sound? _ The elder giggled. What a great way to die so early in the morning, so early in life. Jongin felt like Baekhyun just stabbed his chest with a big smile on his face. He stumbled back a little, gasping lightly from the blow. The pain twisted in his chest. “Good morning!” Jongdae greeted from the door. Jongin flinched, hiding the box between hands from him and Baekhyun, who smiled lovingly to Jongdae. Jongin could only look at it now. He looked so sad, so cautious to the other.  _ One last time, let me hold your hand before we part, Baekhyun. _

With a ring around Jongdae’s finger, the events of a few months ago were buried. Chanyeol didn’t exist. Jongin didn’t have Baekhyun in his arms. The world seemed sound. Jongdae jumped in bed, waiting for Baekhyun to finish showering. He looked at his engagement ring, reflecting how this happened so fast. He just made coffee for the last customer of the day, locking the front doors so they could clean peacefully. When he turned, Baekhyun’s standing there with a ring in hand like it just dropped from the sky. Next to drop was Baekhyun on one knee. Jongin really deserved an MVP award for filming the entire thing for them. He chewed his lip, willing himself to hold his tears. When Jongdae said yes, he looked away, wiping a deviant tear. He stopped filming the two being happy and excused himself to get his things. Though he felt no one would notice, Baekhyun wasn’t that dense. A part of him wanted to run after Jongin. Maybe that’s the part of Baekhyun Jongin always held on to.

Jongdae’s lips twitched slightly, thankful his heart’s at peace. Chanyeol really was one who just stopped by. His chest hurt a little. That day Baekhyun proposed didn’t start as great as his good morning greeting. In the morning train, he met him. Chanyeol had red hair and a new monkey tattoo on his forearm. It’s a different look but his eyes would never fool Jongdae. When Chanyeol lifted his head, hood covering it, exactly when Jongdae entered. The person beside him stood and left. Jongdae took a seat. Chanyeol was frozen. Jongdae looked around before he did a double take on the guitar case bumping his knee. His eyes met Chanyeol’s.

“Y-You’re here.” Jongdae whispered. Chanyeol blinked so many times, unsure of what to say. “But you,”

Chanyeol got up, getting off the next station even if it wasn’t his stop. He felt air rush his lungs when he stepped out of the train. Jongdae was stunned. It really turned out like that, huh? Chanyeol didn’t even spare a word for him. The musician came to his senses a little too late as the doors closed already. He saw Jongdae with his head down. Chanyeol couldn’t move anymore. He made one and it’s the wrong one. He ran his fingers in his hair, frustrated with himself. There goes Jongdae, moving on, while he’s stuck thinking of where to go next. He’s sure Jongdae would be different by then. That difference would be Chanyeol’s doing, because from the moment he left for Japan, the change began. He’s out of moves. Wherever he moved, it’s a dead end. All Chanyeol could do was stay still and muster the courage to press restart. The game’s over as the season changed. It’s no longer winter, no longer the season they met. Will they ever meet again like how winter would come again? Chanyeol hoped so.

\---

Baekhyun smiled as they got off the plane. Jongdae returned the favor of buying such an expensive ring for a trip to Japan. The Cherry Blossoms were in bloom by this time. The two strolled around the park, enjoying a change of scenery. Jongdae saw an ice cream stand and told Baekhyun to wait on the bench while he ordered for them. Baekhyun nodded, letting him go. The smile on his face slowly faded. He looked at the nature Japan had, feeling lonely like those Cherry Blossom trees. Though they’re pretty and alive, they’re just there waiting to fall again. One fell on Baekhyun’s lap. A tear escaped his eye. He’s not stupid. He knew why Jongdae booked tickets for them to Japan on a whim. He’s seen Chanyeol. And Baekhyun knew where he was all this time thanks to Sehun. Thought he continued to act dumb for Jongdae, hiding feelings seemed tough. Baekhyun had to make this right.

Later that evening, Baekhyun snuck out of the room they rented to see Chanyeol. The musician saw him by a table, drinking apple juice with a bendy straw. Classic Baekhyun. It’s closing time and a grown man drinking apple juice stayed. Chanyeol thought he’d leave during his set but guess not. He came with an agenda obviously. Chanyeol got a seat and put his beer bottle in front of the glass of apple juice. He didn’t have all night so Baekhyun better make this good.  _ I’m calling off our wedding. _

“Why? Because you found me?” Chanyeol arched a brow. Baekhyun shook his head.

_ He was never mine to begin with. _

Chanyeol’s eyes softened upon seeing how upset Baekhyun was. Although they wanted the same guy, Chanyeol had a soft spot for Baekhyun. The kiss in the lake surprisingly meant more to him.  _ I have him physically but in his mind and heart, it’s still you. _

“Tell him to forget it.” Chanyeol scoffed.

_ Why, have you? That song may be in Japanese but I understand a big part of it. That flower that’s too beautiful was Jongdae. That winter was the season you two met. And I’m the thorn. _

Chanyeol suddenly got up, chair scraping the floor. The bottle tipped over, spilling all over the wood, as he reached for Baekhyun’s face and kissed him deeply. Baekhyun gripped the table, eyes wide. Beer wasn’t his cup of tea but this felt sweet. Chanyeol stuck his forehead on Baekhyun’s, eyes closed like he’s enduring some pain. “I met you in winter too.” The biggest plot twist just came to light right in front of Baekhyun’s eyes. He’s the flower.

Baekhyun held Chanyeol’s face with shaky hands, turning his face slightly to the side to press his lips on his porcelain skin. The kiss was soft and warm, spreading the fire through Chanyeol’s body. He closed his eyes, accepting rejection. Because if Baekhyun welcomed it, he’d kiss his lips.  _ Jongin. _ “We could’ve avoided all this if you weren’t selfish. No one should be hurting if you didn’t step in and rearrange everything for us. I would’ve stopped myself from loving you too. Jongin wouldn’t be hurting now. Jongdae wouldn’t be confused. Are you happy now?”

Chanyeol got his stuff and left. He hid by a corner, crying his eyes out. He looked up, apologising to the stars. He didn’t mean to hurt Baekhyun like that. He just didn’t appreciate the trip to see him again to say stupid things like hurting Jongdae for him. He’s doing fine restarting his life. “Sumimasen, have you seen a guy around my height? He’s mute and...oh, arigato.” Chanyeol knew that voice even in his sleep. Jongdae’s in his pajama pants and coat, worried sick as to where Baekhyun went. Chanyeol hid himself more. “Oh, well, do you know if the musician in this bar’s still there?” Jongdae asked but got no luck. Chanyeol gasped. Jongdae knew where he worked? Did Baekhyun tell him? He walked past where Chanyeol hid, cautiously checking shops and bars along the street if Baekhyun’s in there. Chanyeol saw his small figure, nervous and cold, hand tightly holding his phone with a photo of Baekhyun on it. Chanyeol decided to follow him by sight. Just as he began walking, Baekhyun came out of the bar, trying to hail a cab. No one stopped for him. He’s been trying to get one for a solid 10 minutes already. He didn’t even see Jongdae down the street going in and out of establishments looking for him. Oh the timing sucked for these two. Baekhyun wiped his eyes. Poor guy’s still crying. Chanyeol felt awful so he made his way to Baekhyun to help him. A guy in passing suddenly choked Baekhyun, pointing a gun to his back. It fired without warning. Chanyeol screamed as the sounds echoed the street. Time suddenly slowed.

It’s not supposed to be like this. Jongdae turned to the sound as a few people scrambled for safety. He saw Chanyeol first, eyes wide, running to the wobbling figure. The bar bouncer nearby disarmed the guy, knocking him unconscious. Baekhyun blinked weakly, looking down to his stomach. Red stained his shirt as he coughed blood. He felt cold. Baekhyun turned his head shakily to Chanyeol.  _ Help me. _

Chanyeol’s knees hit the ground as the body fell in his arms. He caught him a bit too late, head hitting the concrete hard. “Help us, please! Baekhyun, Baekhyun, hey, stay awake.” Chanyeol shook him, panic coursing through his body. His hands were covered in blood. Jongdae dropped his phone, frozen in place. “Baekhyun, god, wake up! I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, please. Jongdae! Jongdae, help me!” Chanyeol looked straight ahead. Now Jongdae’s in a state of panic. He knew he was there? Chanyeol held the side of Baekhyun’s bloody face, controlling the blood loss from his ear. Jongdae finally got to them, not believing this. It’s not Baekhyun that laid in Chanyeol’s arms. No, it’s not Baekhyun looking dazed and weak with a bloodied shirt. Baekhyun coughed up blood. Jongdae knelt beside him, covering Baekhyun’s gunshot wound with shaky hands to stop the bleeding. Oh it’s so warm yet so cold. Jongdae screamed, realisation hitting him. Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun’s head, sobbing his eyes out, apologising. Baekhyun raised his hand to Jongdae’s face. The ring around his finger felt so cold as he hand tried to match its temperature. There’s not much time. Baekhyun smiled weakly, memorising Jongdae’s face.  _ You’re free. _

Jongdae shook his head violently as Baekhyun’s eyes slowly lost focus. The diamonds around his finger stained red. He got Baekhyun from Chanyeol, rocking him in his arms. Chanyeol sat on the concrete, hands in his hair as he screamed and sobbed. He crawled to the suspect, beating up his face even if he’s unconscious. The bouncers tried to stop him but Chanyeol’s too deep in rage. Sirens neared as Jongdae looked at his best friend’s face, wiping blood off his cheeks, keeping his beauty the way Jongdae wanted to remember. “Why, why do you always defy me, huh? Look where it got you this time. Why won’t you listen to me, Baekhyun? Ya, answer me.” There’s no bite to his scolding since his voice was so clipped and choked. Jongdae was upset with him, not mad. “Please? Please defy me one more time, Baekhyun. Forgive me, I can’t protect you.” Hiccups stopped him from talking. “Please come back, Baekhyun. Please,” His voice was so soft, gentle enough to make a child sleep. “I’ll do better. Please, please don’t leave me. What about our family, huh? You promised me we’ll raise them together.” Jongdae wiped his eyes quickly, wanting to see his best friend clearly before he’s taken from him.

Chanyeol left the suspect half dead. He saw Jongdae closing Baekhyun’s eyes, forcing himself to smile a little. Paramedics got Baekhyun from him, forcibly uncurling Jongdae’s fingers off the body. He didn’t fight, but only wanted to hold him a little longer. As Baekhyun’s placed in the ambulance, Jongdae stayed on the floor, dazed. Chanyeol made his way to him, kneeling in front of his once so-called love.

“Yeol-ah, what do I do now?” Jongdae whispered. “Is Baekhyunnie dead?”

“N-no. No, he’s not. He’s strong, Jongdae. You know they’ll bring him back.” Chanyeol comforted but he himself knew it was a miracle.

“W-why was he here? Did...did he see you?” Jongdae’s eyes were a chilling sight. A pit of darkness stared back at the musician, who nodded.

“Yes. Yes, he did. He wanted to call off your wedding.”

“Because he found you?” Jongdae scoffed. “Good thing someone else shot him or else I would.” What a sick joke. “We both know I love him as much as I loved you.”

“That’s exactly it.” Chanyeol wiped his eyes, frustrated he kept crying. “Me too. I do too, Jongdae. That’s why I left! Because I see you but I see him; I see him but I see you!”

Was it possible? Jongdae realized the world wasn’t his alone. Not everything Chanyeol wrote was about him. Not all moments Chanyeol cherished were with him. There were nights Baekhyun didn’t come home where Jongin denied he’s there. Those nights were with Chanyeol. “Why? Why would you take my best friend from me, turn him against me?”

“I swear on my life Jongdae that wasn’t the reason. He had nothing to do with me. He was protecting you. Because he loved Jongin too,” Jongdae slapped Chanyeol hard. “Believe me. I didn’t sleep with him. We kissed but that’s it.”

“This is your fault. All this mess happened because you had to step in my life! I never wanted you in it, Chanyeol! Look where it got us! Baekhyun could be,” Jongdae couldn’t express the truth.

Even if it stared back to him. Baekhyun was clean again. Clean but lifeless. Chanyeol looked through the window, seeing Jongdae seated on the floor, playing jackstones with a flower in the mix. He was smiling, talking to the corpse when he messed up. “It’s not over, Baekhyun. I’ll master this. Wait a little more.” He played again. And again and again until he picked up the flower, letting the ball fall to his palm. It’s over. He raised his gaze to his best friend laid there. “I did it, Baekhyun.” He whispered. “Hey, I did it. Did you see?” No response. “Baekhyun, come on, don’t pretend you didn’t see that. I did so well! Hey,” Jongdae frowned. “Please?” Chanyeol closed his eyes, not wanting to see this anymore. Jongdae became a kid again, hand full of jackstones stretched out to his best friend. “Please Baekhyun, tell me I did well.”

A back hit the metal wall beside Jongdae, sliding down to sit next to him. “Your small hands did it!” Baekhyun clapped. “My Jongdae did it!” He rest his head on his best friend’s shoulder, proud smile on his face. “I did. Thank you for being patient with me.” Jongdae smiled to his best friend, kissing his forehead. “It’s so good to hear your voice again.”

“Why are your eyes swollen? Who hurt you?” Baekhyun worried, touching the other’s eyes.

“No one. I’m alright.” Jongdae assured him.

“Eh? Liar.” Baekhyun scoffed. “It’s me again, right?” Jongdae didn’t say anything. “I’m right! Only I can make you cry. What did I do now? Tell me! I need to apologise.” Baekhyun felt like it’s a light challenge for fun, chin raised, pouting too.

“You...you died.” Jongdae still had a small smile on his face.

“Ah, so that’s me.” Baekhyun pointed to the body. “Can’t say I’m sorry. I didn’t kill myself.” Always a smart mouth. He did a double take on Jongdae’s growing smile. “What is that? Did you kill me? Kim Jongdae, I knew you were a thief but not a murderer!”

“You’re speaking.” Jongdae chuckled as tears sprang to his eyes. Baekhyun tried to vocalise, amazed.

“Death does wonders, wow. Will Mr. Grim Reaper get mad at me if I extend five more minutes?” Baekhyun goofed off, making Jongdae laugh a little.

“Go,” Jongdae whispered. Baekhyun thought about it. “You’ll always be with me, Baekhyun.” The elder nodded, kissing Jongdae’s cheek. “I’m sorry I broke some promises. Our family, that house by the sea, getting new batteries for our clock at home, Chanyeol. He loves us, you know. What guy in the world would welcome loving two? Well, one now.” Baekhyun left one last kiss.

“Stop that. I’m sorry for cheating on you with him. He said the truth; we didn’t sleep together. But please love him like you loved me. Love him like how we’re supposed to. Don’t worry about me anymore, Jongdae. Thank you for taking care of me. I love you.” When Jongdae opened his eyes, he’s alone once again.

A tear escaped Baekhyun’s eye, falling sideways.

\---

Sweat dripped down as groans took over the room. Jongin rushed inside the room, shaking Baekhyun awake. He’s drenched in sweat. His eyes opened, panic and fear in his eyes as air rushing in and out of his lungs. Jongin held him down, worried about how he acted. He’s in black dress pants and a white shirt. “Baekhyun, Baekhyun, it’s just a dream. Hey, breathe.”

Baekhyun kept touching his body, checking if he’s been shot. He signed for Jongdae. “What? He’s getting ready. What happened in your dream?” Jongin looked at the door. “Do you know your name?”

_ Yes. Byun Baekhyun. _ “Where are you now?”

_ Home.  _ “Uh,” Jongin looked around, sure this wasn’t their home. Baekhyun looked around.  _ I’m not in Japan, right?  _ “What? No. Do you know what’s happening today?” Jongin pointed to his outfit. He’s in a suit with a flower pinned to his jacket pocket. Baekhyun looked at his clothes then the room. “It’s your wedding day, Baekhyun. You’re getting married today. To Jongdae.”

_ Did we fly to Japan last week? Where’s Chanyeol? Jongin, I died. Why am I here now? _

“Huh? Baekhyun, your trip to Japan was a year ago. Why are you looking for Chanyeol now? No one knows where he is. What do you mean you’re dead? Did you die in your dream?” Jongin was so confused.

Baekhyun ran his hands in his hair then down his face.  _ I can’t do this. _ Jongin panicked when Baekhyun got off the bed and changed his shirt.  _ Jongin, I can’t do this to Jongdae. _

“Isn’t it a bit too late for regret?” Jongin chuckled. Baekhyun looked at the younger a bit too long. He had his hands in his pockets, standing coolly. Baekhyun took a step forward and kissed him. Jongin felt his chest open up again. He held Baekhyun’s lower back, letting it linger a little more. Jongin blinked twice as they pulled back. He missed that taste, that feeling so much. But it wasn’t right anymore. “I-I, sorry.” Jongin sighed. “Did you forget I’m seeing someone now?”

Baekhyun directed it to the wrong person. Stupid dream, he needed to remember it. Who was the person he kissed in his dream aside from Jongdae? The groom ran outside, wanting some air. On his way to the lobby, a laugh stopped him. Was this still a dream? Chanyeol’s in a maroon suit with a black button down, smiling to the receptionist. Baekhyun hid behind a column, peeking slowly to see him better. Oh this man changed a lot. He looked so mature now with his black hair styled up. His shoulders were bigger too. What’s he doing here? “Is that Chan--?” Baekhyun pulled Jongin to hide with him.

_ Did you invite him?  _ “Me? I have no fucking clue where he was for a year! Why me?” Baekhyun thought for a moment. A plan came to his head, signing quickly to tell Jongin. The younger worried again. “Why are you hurting yourself, Baek? You deserve to be loved too.”

_ Yes, I know. But I need them to get back together so I can be loved too. It’s a polyamory thing. _ Jongin shrugged and followed Chanyeol while Baekhyun ran to the elevators again.

Chanyeol looked at the venue, taking photos of the decor. Jongin strode coolly to his side, hands in his pocket. “It could’ve been designed better.” Jongin commented. “No, it looks really elegant.” Chanyeol mumbled, flinching after seeing who was beside him. “Long time to see, Chanyeol.”

“Jongin, hi. You know who will get married?” Chanyeol looked around.

“Mhmm. You do too.” Jongin looked sad. The wedding coordinator spotted the musician, pulling him to his station already. Chanyeol was a hired replacement since the original DJ cancelled last minute. He’s been home for three months already, finishing a production for some groups overseas. This was a last minute favor for his fellow musician. He set up his equipment, checking the playlist ready. The songs were so nostalgic to him, he remembered some faces too. Going home was a struggle for him, remembering those faces he left behind. Now these songs.

“Remember to greet the newlyweds after the kiss, okay? It’s Jongdae and Baekhyun.” She reminded. Chanyeol dropped the cords in hand. He picked them up quickly, smirking sadly.

“Oh, they did end up together, huh?” Chanyeol mumbled, regretting coming home.

“You know them?” She was pleasantly surprised. Chanyeol couldn’t say he slept with one and made out with the other. For him, it wasn’t a big surprise, but being there in the actual event was. How would the two react if they found out? This got him worried. He excused himself to go to the bathroom.

Baekhyun entered Jongdae’s room, breath taken away when he saw how handsome Jongdae looked. The younger was surprised to see him...not dressed.  _ I can’t do this, Jongdae. _ Baekhyun kissed Jongdae deeply then pulled back.  _ I’m sorry, but you hired an awful wedding coordinator. I hate the flowers being all white. Thanks for putting one vase of Pompons but I need more Pompons. Shit, you look so good. I’m going to regret this in a minute. _

“Baekhyun, wait, what’s going on?” Jongdae grew nervous at his best friend’s actions. Baekhyun did his hand gesture for Chanyeol. “That’s a sick joke, Baekhyun. He can’t be here now.”

_ I wouldn’t give up the happiest day of my life if I was joking. He’s here, Jongdae. Go see him. I’ll handle everyone. _ Baekhyun knew this was the right thing. Jongdae was so conflicted. He hugged Baekhyun tightly, thanking him for giving an option. Baekhyun pushed him to the door, smiling. When Jongdae was gone, Baekhyun held his chest as it tightened. Tears sprang his eyes. He fell on his knees, pained about the decisions he made but he had to do it. For Jongdae’s happiness.

Chanyeol washed his face, calming his nerves. This was so wrong. He never even got the chance to get over them. Yeah he’s with Jongdae often but there were real moments with Baekhyun. Those moments unspoken of were times where he smiled the most. Several nights, Baekhyun watched him play his gigs, cheering him on. Yes, it was a small act of friendship but it meant a lot to him. There were nights Baekhyun went to his home to play with Toben. It gave Chanyeol some moments of rest. Though their interactions were never intended for love, Chanyeol couldn’t help falling in love with him. To Baekhyun, he was just trying to be closer to his best friend’s lover. The mistakes piled from there. Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun first, falling to the sofa. Baekhyun hurriedly left, knowing it was wrong. But Chanyeol was surprised to see him at his gig, drinking his usual; apple juice with a bendy straw. There were mornings they rode the train together, sleeping on each other’s shoulder but no malice intended. Things got complicated when they kissed at nights and in the river by the mountains.

Baekhyun was never sensual with Chanyeol until that moment. It’s like they forgot one person loved them both too. It opened the possibility of them loving each other too. Chanyeol kept his heart full until then. Now he’s out of the loop, because he walked away.

“He was right.” Chanyeol looked at the person standing by the entrance. “Y-You’re here.”

Chanyeol felt like it was a rewind from where everything went wrong for him. Two words made him cower but not anymore. Jongdae’s there in a suit, ready to be married. Chanyeol stood straighter. Jongdae’s fucking blond and absolutely stunning. “I don’t mean ill, Jongdae. My buddy’s supposed to be here but he cancelled and gave this to me. I didn’t know it was your wedding.” Chanyeol looked ashamed. “You look, you look really good.”

Baekhyun was right about hiring an awful wedding coordinator. “Have you been eating well?” Jongdae asked randomly. Maybe not so random since he really wanted to know. Chanyeol nodded. “H-How’s Toben?”

“He’s healthy. Is-Is Baekhyun doing well?” Chanyeol wanted to claw his skin. This was so awkward.

“He’s the one who told me you were here.” It was a surprise. Jongdae nodded, surprised too. “Baekhyun, he, um, he called off the wedding. Think I should help him calm our parents.” Chanyeol nodded, a whirlwind of emotions consuming him. “Uh, stay there. I’ll just help him. Please.” Jongdae looked back, pointing a finger to his spot.

“R-Right here?” Chanyeol’s eyes were so wide as he pointed to the floor.

“Maybe not here in the bathroom, but um, don’t leave. I-I need to talk to you.” Jongdae couldn’t word his sentences. Before Jongdae left, he complimented Chanyeol. “It’s really good to see you again. You seem well.”

Chanyeol did another round of face washing, calming his nerves. What the fuck just happened? He exited the washroom, seeing people leave the venue with bags of food and tokens. Jongin bowed to each one, apologising for the hassle. Baekhyun was on the other side of the place, head down, being scolded by his father. Jongdae’s on the other side, hugging his crying mother. Chanyeol packed his things quietly, avoiding all eye contact. Soon enough, someone kicked a chair. Jongdae and his parents flinched upon hearing it. Baekhyun’s mother cried as the men fought.  _ Keep yelling! Do it because I can’t speak! You’re good at making me feel worthless since the accident! Dad, come on, it’s been years!  _ Jongdae watched his best friend defend himself. A hard slap came across Baekhyun’s face. His mother screamed for them to stop. Jongdae’s dad stepped in, holding Baekhyun.

“If you won’t show your son the same courtesy he’s shown all of us despite this event, you may go.” Mr. Kim said honorably. Mrs. Byun hugged her son, assuring him it’s okay, as Mr. Byun pulled her off her son.  _ I do love Jongdae, Mom, and he loves me. This wasn’t a joke. We just have reasons to decide better for us. _ She nodded, understanding her son. Once Baekhyun’s parents were gone, Jongdae checked on him, seeing the bruise on his cheekbone. Oh how lucky Jongdae was to have really kind parents. They apologised for this unfortunate event, still welcoming Baekhyun to their family. Baekhyun hugged them, removing his pride to apologise to them traditionally, formally.

Once everyone was gone, it’s just the two supposed-to-be newlyweds. Baekhyun pulled Jongdae to the altar, taking their positions. They stood face to face, hands holding each other’s. “Baekhyun, why did you just do that?” Jongdae mumbled, genuinely curious.

_ Is your heart fully mine? Be honest. I know the answer but tell me. _ Jongdae shook his head. Baekhyun smirked, looking at the DJ booth to Chanyeol. He felt like he was intruding all this time. Knowing he witnessed the most intimate event between the two felt uncomfortable.  _ Me too. _ Jongdae looked at the booth. Baekhyun cupped Jongdae’s face, kissing him.  _ He’s waiting for you, Jongdae. Make your heart happy. _ Jongdae nodded, thanking Baekhyun wholeheartedly. As he made his way to Chanyeol, the musician couldn’t take his eyes off Baekhyun. He’s still snow, beautiful and comforting, but how tragic he trapped himself in his own blizzard. Seeing the two made up and hold each other again was a weight off Baekhyun’s shoulders. He looked away when they shared a kiss. It’s not his place to feel anything about that. He’s done enough damage. He left the ring on top of Jongdae’s things on the chair. Jongin was with his boyfriend Kyungsoo when they saw Baekhyun exit the venue alone. Baekhyun was annoyingly handsome dressed in a white button down and black dress pants. His jacket hung on his hand, while the other hand’s in his pocket. Even his sullen expression made him strikingly handsome. Jongin couldn’t stop looking at him. Kyungsoo watched his boyfriend’s expression, knowing all too well the story about them. “He’s really something, Jongin. I hope his heart finds peace.”

“Me too,” Jongin pitied the boy he once loved. Everyone fell in love with him, only to leave alone.

Outside the hotel, Baekhyun let the cold winter wind touch his face. Everyone around him had padded jackets, gloves, and hats. He’s pretty bare without those, not minding the cold. An old lady selling hot packs saw him walking without warmth. She handed him a pack for free, signing that he’s handsome. Baekhyun thanked him the same way. He finally had something to offer.

He entered the cemetery gate, slightly shivering. In a mausoleum, he found warmth. He offered the hot pack to a name similar to his. It’s his biological father. He sat in front of his tomb, signing that he’s okay, he’s doing well in his job.  _ Dad, are you proud? I’m not selfish anymore. I let go of the best thing I have. _ Baekhyun smiled a little.  _ Sorry you didn’t get to attend but no wedding happened. Please be warm. Keep this flower, okay?  _ Baekhyun brought out a Pompon from his jacket pocket, placing it by the hot pack.  _ Pompons are for hope, lasting friendship, and love.  _ Baekhyun’s hands shook as his breath fogged in front of him.  _ It also means death in some countries. Dad, I died in my dream. _ Baekhyun cried, wiping it quickly before chuckling.  _ Anyway, I’m just stopping by because I’m leaving. That house you left me by the sea will have a caretaker now. I was saving it for Jongdae. Guess I can still be selfish. _ Baekhyun paid his respects and closed the gate. He looked up the cloudy sky, feeling the cold against his skin. What a wonderful yet painful feeling it was.

Back at the hotel, Jongdae and Chanyeol caught up, walking to the elevators hand in hand. They saw Jongin and Kyungsoo making their way out of the lobby. “Hey Jongin, thanks for helping us out. Have you seen Baek?” Jongdae seemed okay already. Jongin wanted to punch him. “He left. But hey, congrats on getting back together.”

Chanyeol sighed, knowing exactly how that went. Baekhyun’s a master of leaving without a word. Jongdae looked at Chanyeol with a different expression. There’s no worry in it anymore. “You. You find him this time. Tell him everything. Bring Baekhyun back, Chanyeol. He has to know.” Jongdae urged.

For two weeks, the pair looked around the city for Baekhyun. His family was no luck. Chanyeol was surprised to know the person who slapped Baekhyun was just his stepfather, his real father’s brother to be exact. Jongdae visited Mrs. Byun again, begging her to tell him places Baekhyun could’ve went. Chanyeol drove to the cemetery, finding Baekhyun’s real father’s tomb. A roaming cleaner saw him searching, pointing a white mausoleum to the left of the field. Chanyeol ran there, cupping his eyes by the glass to see the inside better. A wilted flower was on the ground; a Pompon. It’s Baekhyun. He called Jongdae, telling him Baekhyun went to his father not long ago. Jongdae looked at Mrs. Byun, lonely and quiet. “Mrs. Byun, please tell me where Baekhyun and Mr. Byun spent the most time.” She sighed, out of excuses since Jongdae figured out anyway.

Chanyeol drove to the village near the sea, picking up Jongdae along the way. The elder bit his nail, hoping they’d find him there. “Why did we have to fall into this?” Jongdae sighed, turning the car heater on. “It’s not a common relationship status for sure. Loving two people at the same time?”

“We’re luckier than most. But we’re not complete if part of our heart’s in hiding.” Chanyeol said the truth. “I should’ve told you a long time ago.”

“Which part? That Baekhyun’s been visiting you at night or kissing him because the situation called for it?” Jongdae had so much bite to his words.

“As if you weren’t sleeping with him behind my back,” Chanyeol rolled his eyes. “We all have faults here, cheating with each other. The difference with my relationship with you and my relationship with him is that I never told him it’s real for me.”

“Why didn’t you tell him?” Jongdae’s tone softened, eyes focused on Chanyeol’s profile. Chanyeol spared him a glance before looking on the road again.

“I didn’t think it was possible. You already had your heart full, and telling you I liked your best friend seemed so wrong. I worried about what you’d think too. Baekhyun’s been your priority so I left jealous, with the both of you. I wanted to be your priority, at the same time I wanted to take care of Baekhyun. You’re hearing me right, right? It sounds so fucked up when I say it now.” Chanyeol chuckled. Jongdae nodded. “Polyamory is something I didn’t know could happen to me. I’m glad you two accept me.”

“I do. Baekhyun, I don’t know. I just miss him so much.” Jongdae looked out the window, seeing the sea already. Chanyeol reached for Jongdae’s hand, metals clashing. Jongdae wore Baekhyun’s ring on top of his own while Chanyeol got one similar to theirs. He’s in this mess whether people judged him for it or not.

The two parked the car before the shore proper, going down the steps afterwards to see the view. It’s very cold by the sea but it’s refreshing. They checked the house Mrs. Byun told Jongdae, stunning the both at how spacious it was. The two-storey wood and glass home stood out from the few houses there. No one was home but the gate was open. Chanyeol went around the house, seeing Baekhyun’s backyard; the sea. A figure stood on the shore, only wearing his pants. Chanyeol squinted, realising this guy had silver hair. It’s him! He called for Jongdae to follow him as he ran, taking off his jacket and shirt. Baekhyun just dove in the sea, swimming far. Jongdae saw it, getting the towels from the bathroom and running after them.

Baekhyun smiled when he surfaced. Oh it was so cold! He floated around, loving the numbness. He forgot to check the incoming waves so he sank. Chanyeol swam faster, going under the waves. Seawater hurt his eyes but he had to keep them open to see Baekhyun. His hands reached for Baekhyun’s torso, dragging him up to the surface. Baekhyun coughed, turning around to see who touched him. “Are you out of your mind?” Chanyeol screamed. His black hair stuck to his forehead, making Baekhyun giggle. “What’s so funny? You could’ve died!”

_ But I didn’t. What are you doing here? _ Chanyeol calmed his breathing, hugging Baekhyun this time. Another wave came barreling fast. He pulled them underwater, avoiding it. Chanyeol held Baekhyun’s waist tightly, burying his face to his neck. When they came up again, Chanyeol hiccuped. Baekhyun looked at the side of his face, noticing that he’s crying. “Don’t leave us like that. Please Baekhyun, don’t do that again.” Chanyeol kissed his neck, sniffing in between breaths. “I can’t lose you too.” Baekhyun pressed his lips on Chanyeol’s cheek, speaking on his skin.  _ What are you talking about? _

Chanyeol pulled back a little, looking at Baekhyun’s eyes. He couldn’t say it. So he showed it. Chanyeol tipped Baekhyun’s chin up slightly, kissing his lips gently, remembering how he did it in the lake. Baekhyun froze for a moment until he closed his eyes, holding Chanyeol too.  _ Took you long enough to feel it. _ Baekhyun mouthed against Chanyeol’s lips, that spread into a smile. They kissed a little more, missing the taste and feeling. Though they only kissed five times in the past, there’s time to add more now. Baekhyun rode on Chanyeol’s back while the younger swam for them. Jongdae stood on the shore, relieved to see Baekhyun again. Chanyeol strode to Jongdae first, kissing him softly before getting a towel and drying his hair. The elder smiled upon seeing them so domestic. Baekhyun began laughing.  _ You got nothing for me, Kim Jongdae? Wow, Chanyeol’s officially number one in my heart now. _ The youngest of the three scoffed, pushing Jongdae to near his best friend. Baekhyun went up the sand faster, holding Jongdae’s face for the deepest kiss he could give. Jongdae wrapped a towel around him, apologising over and over. Baekhyun shook his head, smiling peacefully. Jongdae got Baekhyun’s hand, slipping his ring back.  _ I missed you. _ “I really love you, Baekhyun. We both do.” Jongdae mumbled, reminding the elder that he deserved the love in the entire world. So let two people show him.

In the house, Baekhyun laid on Jongdae’s lap in front of the fireplace. Chanyeol’s busy cooking dinner for them. Jongdae hummed a song, letting Baekhyun sleep. He wasn’t tired at all so he got up to help Chanyeol. The youngest taught Baekhyun how to cut vegetables while Jongdae took photos of them. Chanyeol had his hands on Baekhyun’s hips while watching him cut some. Jongdae sat across the counter, admiring the two. Chanyeol winked to Jongdae then kissed Baekhyun’s cheek as a reward for doing well. Jongdae leaned over to give him a smooch too for doing well. Baekhyun scoffed, 100% owning the chopping board.

Jongdae was in the bathtub when Baekhyun came in alone. Chanyeol’s on the bed, playing with his guitar. Jongdae looked at him expectantly. Baekhyun took a seat beside him, outside the tub.  _ Chanyeol’s body wash is too strong. It’s smelling until the first floor. _ Baekhyun smiled. “I used his. He used yours.” Jongdae admitted. Baekhyun looked at the focused man outside, leaning against the headboard while he plucked strings mindlessly.  _ How will this work exactly? _

“Well, love me, love him. Be honest. Is that hard?” Jongdae rest his arms on the edge of the tub, resting his chin on his forearms. Baekhyun shook his head. “And tell us if you’ll go out.” Baekhyun nodded. He looked at Chanyeol again.  _ Okay but what about the sex? _ Jongdae hit his head. “Do as you please, Baekhyun. We’ll figure it out.” Baekhyun waved his hands, erasing Jongdae’s wrong idea.  _ No! No, I don’t want to sleep with him.  _ “Sure you don’t,” Jongdae scoffed. Baekhyun sighed, slashing water to Jongdae’s face. Chanyeol watched the two have a water fight. He looked at his ring then closed his eyes for a moment. He was woken up by kisses to his cheeks. It’s really something new but they’ll figure it out.

Baekhyun woke up early, feeling warm. He’s naked and warm in winter. That seemed wrong. Jongdae breathed on Baekhyun’s jaw as he slept, equally naked as him. Chanyeol’s black fluffy hair tickled his neck. The two clung on to him as he slept. Baekhyun groaned, trying to push one off. “Where are you going this time?” Jongdae mumbled, voice thick with sleep, eyes closed. Chanyeol stirred a bit, arm tightening around Baekhyun’s torso. The elder sighed, trying to raise his head to speak to Jongdae’s skin but Chanyeol’s weight wouldn’t let him move. The youngest looked up, chin resting on Baekhyun’s chest. He blinked his eyes, seeing Baekhyun better. The sight of love bites all over Baekhyun’s skin made him smirk loosely. Jongdae kissed Baekhyun’s cheek, sucking it lightly. “Dae, I want more.” Chanyeol pouted.

“Shh! Baekhyun’s trying to leave.” Jongdae scolded. Chanyeol trailed kisses from Baekhyun’s chest to his lips.

“Let him use the bathroom, Dae.” Chanyeol had a secretive smile on his face. Jongdae untangled himself from Baekhyun, aching in some parts. “Let’s see if he get there.” Jongdae smiled, knowing exactly what that meant. Baekhyun tried getting up, mouth open as he couldn’t move as fast as he could. Oh he felt everything now. Chanyeol sat back in bed, watching Baekhyun move slowly to get off the bed. Jongdae did the same, not helping him. “Did you get hammered well, Kim-Park-Byun Baekhyun?” Jongdae teased, scratching his neck. Baekhyun’s face scrunched in pain as he tried to stand. His ass hurts so much.

“Greedy Baekhyunnie, wanting two at a time?” Chanyeol closed his eyes, still tired from the sex. He had to work double time, making both of them feel everything all at once. Jongdae rolled over, kissing Chanyeol before getting up to help Baekhyun walk. He felt the ache of being sandwiched by the two but he’s used to Chanyeol. Baekhyun wasn’t.

In the bathroom, Baekhyun stayed in the tub, sobbing without tears as the pain spread in his system.  _ Can’t say it didn’t feel good, but I can’t walk. _ Chanyeol kissed Baekhyun’s forehead, walking to the sink. He’s already in his shorts. “So you won’t run off anymore.”

“Will you come home, Baek?” Jongdae asked as he washed Baekhyun’s body. The elder shook his head.

_ We’ll stay here. _ Baekhyun signed.  _ I promised you a house by the sea. It’s closer to Minseok’s bar too. _ Chanyeol nodded, looking at himself as he brushed his teeth.

“And us?” Jongdae wondered. Baekhyun smiled.

_ There’s a music academy nearby. _ Jongdae gasped. Chanyeol knew that academy. He graduated from there.  _ Let’s make dreams come true, Jongdae. _

“Well, is it a good time to say it?” Chanyeol sat on the counter, shaking his hair with a pretty boy smile. The two gave their attention now. “The reason I left for Japan was for music, you know that. And to get a teaching license...for music.” Jongdae’s brows shot up. Baekhyun held his best friend’s hand tighter. “I’m teaching in the academy next school year.”

Baekhyun splashed the water, absolutely happy.  _ We have a ride to school! _ Chanyeol was so offended. Jongdae laughed. Of all things Baekhyun thought of, he liked that idea best. “What will you teach?” Jongdae wondered.

“Many instruments; guitar, drums, trumpet, piano, maybe applied music? Vocals if needed.” Chanyeol counted. It fit so well because Baekhyun wanted to major in piano while Jongdae wanted vocals.

_ He’s very good in vocals. He reached a new scale last night.  _ Baekhyun snickered. Chanyeol blushed. “See you both in class, loves.” He got off the counter to make breakfast for everyone. Jongdae looked at Baekhyun out of worry.

“Will his license be alright? He’s technically sleeping with students.” Jongdae blinked. Baekhyun laughed silently.  _ Let’s see if we can get in this fall. _ “A new season with Park Chanyeol? Can we get married by then?” Jongdae kissed Baekhyun’s hand, hoping they would. Chanyeol stood outside, hearing Jongdae’s plans. “We will, Dae. I’m not letting you both go anymore.” He whispered.

Months later, Chanyeol parked the car at the academy lot, kissing Jongdae first then Baekhyun before they got off. “You didn’t hear it from me but practice room 3’s vacant all afternoon.” Chanyeol slung his guitar over his shoulder, walking first. Baekhyun clung around Jongdae, biting his jacket, winking at Chanyeol. Jongdae rolled his eyes, dismissing the professor with a hand. Chanyeol chuckled, excited for this afternoon.

Byun: absent.

Kim: absent.

Practice Room 3: Occupied.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



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